It's A Wrap

The show is over.

The audience is subdued.

Perhaps it was wrong to end on a sad note.

But no.

Costa addresses the audience.

Costa: The cast will be happy to stay behind and answer questions, and that includes me.

Him. What a carrot!

About fifty people cluster around Costa.

My hairy melons turned yellow and dried up early. My apples have fruit fly. They're all soft in the middle. Where's the best spot for a bird bath? What can we do for the bees?

Fuck this, says Sweezus.

I agree, says Vello. We need to get going. The head gardener might turn up any minute.

I'll try and wind things up, says Belle.

She goes over to Arthur, and whips his curly black wig off.

Ah! A gasp from a few of the ladies. It's not really Costa.

No, says Arthur. It's not.

So you know nothing, says Peg. Only what's scripted.

I know enough. I did my own research, says Arthur.

You did a good job, says Merle. We were convinced you were Costa. You even rode a bicycle.

What's your next project? asks Peg. Another play?

No, says Arthur. Saving endangered species.

How wonderful! says Peg.

Some others have heard the words endangered species.

They were drifting away, but come back.

Birds? asks one. The swift parrot?

No, says Arthur. Spiders. You should talk to Gaius. He's the main man.

They surge towards Gaius, who is taking his skirt off.

It was a cushion! says Peg. I knew it!

Indeed it was, says Gaius. I'll be glad to see the back of it.

That young actor said you were the head of the next project, says Merle. Endangered spiders.

Wrong, says Gaius.

You're not?

They're not, says Gaius. Not these ones. Arthur needs to get up to speed. We intend to travel to Western Australia to a biodiversity hot spot, where new species of peacock spiders are continually being discovered. My aim is to join Project Maratus and discover a new one.

How exciting! says Merle. I'm from Western Australia. Whereabouts is this biodiversity hotspot?

Ur-hum, Lake Jasper, if my memory serves me, says Gaius. I must check the map for its exact location.

I know Lake Jasper, says Merle. I have family living in Albany. If you like I'll give you their address.

She scribbles a note on the back of the flier that highlighted Arthur's blue eyes.

Come ON! says Belle.

Sorry to have to love you and leave you, says Gaius, wittily.

Even though he is not.

Merle thrusts the note into a slit in his cushion, and leaves with Peg through the fence hole.

What a great night it was.

 Soon the Botanic Garden corner is deserted, except for the Swiss cotton curtain, a few gutted candles, and.....

Nobby, still wrapped up like a coconut.