The plane has departed for Adelaide.
Unni walks back through the airport, thinking of catching a train.
As she passes the Coffee Club, she sees a security guard placing flags round a table.
It's the table where, earlier, she, Arthur, Pablo and Dries had been drinking their coffee.
It might be a bomb threat. She goes up to the guard.
I was just sitting there! says Unni.
Oh, were you? says the guard. Did you by any chance place a dead bird in a coffee cup?
No, says Unni. But I know who might have. Why?
Because there is a dead bird in this coffee cup, says the guard. Can you identify it?
He holds out the cup.
A bedraggled baby Bristlebird is stretched out on the bottom, not breathing.
I know it, says Unni. It's only just hatched. I knew Arth.... my friend shouldn't have given it coffee.
Your friend gave a newly hatched bird coffee! says the guard. I must say, milk would have been better. I wouldn't be surprised if this little tacker's gone into cardiac arrest.
Can we get him out of the coffee cup? asks Unni.
Sure, says the guard, who likes birds, and hates to see dead ones.
The guard tips the baby Bristlebird onto the table.
A crowd has gathered.
Is it a bomb threat? asks someone. Should we be running?
It's a fake bird, says another. I think it's ticking!
Please move on, says the guard. It's a small medical emergency. If you want to help, go and fetch a defibrillator. There's one on the wall there.
The crowd parts so that one of them can run to the wall and fetch the defibrillator.
It's too big, say Unni, when the defibrillator is brought to the table.
Yes it is, says the guard. I should have known. I'm a bit flustered. Time is crucial in cardiac arrest cases.
Look, it's moving, says a woman.
So it is. All it needed was to be taken out of the coffee cup.
Hic squaw wee! The baby Bristlebird looks round for his mother. Where is she?
She had deep blue eyes and a pocket full of feathers. She gave him a very strong stimulant. He can still smell it.
( The baby Bristlebird has taken Arthur for its mother, in a natural process which biologists call IMPRINTING.)
Give him to me, says Unni.
Okay, says the guard. Here he is. All's well that ends well.
He removes the flags from round the table and returns the too-big defibrillator.
Unni cups the baby Bristlebird in her hand and strokes it gently.
What am I going to do with you, baby?
The baby Bristlebird glares at her with the same steely eyes as its parents.
NOTHING, LADY. YOU'RE NOT MY MOTHER.
Saturday, November 21, 2015
Friday, November 20, 2015
Red Alert, Not Saying Why
Sydney Airport.
Arthur's phone rings.
It's Sweezus.
Miraculously, Arthur's battery is not flat.
Hello, says Arthur. We're just boarding.
For? says Sweezus.
Adelaide, says Arthur. Me and Pablo, and this other guy called Dries.
Does he ride? asks Sweezus. ( He means a bicycle)
Yes, says Arthur. Schopenhauer's bike.
Cool! says Sweezus. I'm getting a team up for the Tour Down Under.
That's a long time off, says Arthur.
Yep, says Sweezus. Organised as. So how come you're heading home early? Thought you were heading up to Ray's place.
Birds died, says Arthur. So we don't have to.
Excellent, says Sweezus. Bad luck, for Gaius though.
Well, not entirely, says Arthur.
How come? asks Sweezus.
Uh-oh! Red alert.
Nothing, says Arthur. Got to board now. See you shortly.
Click.
Arthur, Pablo and Dries say goodbye to Unni.
Unni says goodbye to them.
Baggage is being loaded.
Where's the baby?
.........
On the flight.
Dries: It was lucky no one noticed.
Arthur: Mm.
Dries: What does Mm mean?
Pablo: It means he's not saying why it isn't lucky no one noticed.
Dries: Is that correct?
Arthur: Mm.
Dries: Turn out your pockets.
Arthur turns out his pockets.
Dirty Russian feathers, knitting needles that were used as props in a production, bun crumbs, tiny bits of egg shell.
Dries: Where's the baby?
Arthur: Not here. I had to make a hard decision.
........
Well, what would you do?
Your cycling team leader will go ballistic if you rock up with the baby of the two birds that he is obviously delighted are no longer in this world to torment him.
Arthur's phone rings.
It's Sweezus.
Miraculously, Arthur's battery is not flat.
Hello, says Arthur. We're just boarding.
For? says Sweezus.
Adelaide, says Arthur. Me and Pablo, and this other guy called Dries.
Does he ride? asks Sweezus. ( He means a bicycle)
Yes, says Arthur. Schopenhauer's bike.
Cool! says Sweezus. I'm getting a team up for the Tour Down Under.
That's a long time off, says Arthur.
Yep, says Sweezus. Organised as. So how come you're heading home early? Thought you were heading up to Ray's place.
Birds died, says Arthur. So we don't have to.
Excellent, says Sweezus. Bad luck, for Gaius though.
Well, not entirely, says Arthur.
How come? asks Sweezus.
Uh-oh! Red alert.
Nothing, says Arthur. Got to board now. See you shortly.
Click.
Arthur, Pablo and Dries say goodbye to Unni.
Unni says goodbye to them.
Baggage is being loaded.
Where's the baby?
.........
On the flight.
Dries: It was lucky no one noticed.
Arthur: Mm.
Dries: What does Mm mean?
Pablo: It means he's not saying why it isn't lucky no one noticed.
Dries: Is that correct?
Arthur: Mm.
Dries: Turn out your pockets.
Arthur turns out his pockets.
Dirty Russian feathers, knitting needles that were used as props in a production, bun crumbs, tiny bits of egg shell.
Dries: Where's the baby?
Arthur: Not here. I had to make a hard decision.
........
Well, what would you do?
Your cycling team leader will go ballistic if you rock up with the baby of the two birds that he is obviously delighted are no longer in this world to torment him.
Thursday, November 19, 2015
Airport Baby With Potential
Sydney Airport. Coffee Club.
How do we know the parent birds are dead? What proof have we? asks Dries.
I told you, says Unni. And Dad told me.
Did you see the bodies? asks Dries, who we will remember is a seasoned trauma counsellor.
No, says Unni. When I got the box back, it was empty.
But for the egg, says Dries.
No, the egg was in Dad's hand, says Unni.
I think, says Dries, that the Twenty Persons Committee has every right to ask for their money back.
Did you hear that? says Arthur.
Yes, says Pablo. They want their money back.
Without a death certificate, says Arthur.
All right, says Dries. Perhaps we can resolve this in some other way.
Arthur feels the egg trembling in his pocket.
I think it's hatching, says Arthur. He lifts it out, and places it on the table.
The egg trembles violently. It was nice in Arthur's pocket. It could feel Arthur's warm leg. And something that felt pleasantly soft and at the same time scratchy. And something else, that was sharp and pointy, and metallic. Of course, the egg would not have used these adjectives.
Look! says Unni. A little hole!
Of course, we've all seen a little hole appearing.
It's getting bigger!
Yes, we've all seen that before. Get to the last part.
They watch, and drink their coffee.
The egg cracks open and a little baby Bristlebird's beak pokes out.
No, not that part. The part when it emerges fully!
At last! Here it is, in its entirety!
Oh how cute! says Unni. I wonder if they'll let you take it on the plane.
Beep! Imagine you have just come out into the world expecting to be in an ovoid ground nest, somewhere in a forest, with a mummy and a daddy who look a lot like you except with better feathers, and who have brought you food.....
........and instead, what you are faced with is an existential question.
Will they let me on the plane?
The baby's little face falls. It looks at Arthur, with its newly opened eyes.
Arthur is not cold hearted. He dips his finger in his coffee and holds his wet finger to the baby's beak.
The baby sucks up his first taste of coffee.
Hic squaw wee!
Already with the language skills! It is obvious the baby has a great deal of potential.
How do we know the parent birds are dead? What proof have we? asks Dries.
I told you, says Unni. And Dad told me.
Did you see the bodies? asks Dries, who we will remember is a seasoned trauma counsellor.
No, says Unni. When I got the box back, it was empty.
But for the egg, says Dries.
No, the egg was in Dad's hand, says Unni.
I think, says Dries, that the Twenty Persons Committee has every right to ask for their money back.
Did you hear that? says Arthur.
Yes, says Pablo. They want their money back.
Without a death certificate, says Arthur.
All right, says Dries. Perhaps we can resolve this in some other way.
Arthur feels the egg trembling in his pocket.
I think it's hatching, says Arthur. He lifts it out, and places it on the table.
The egg trembles violently. It was nice in Arthur's pocket. It could feel Arthur's warm leg. And something that felt pleasantly soft and at the same time scratchy. And something else, that was sharp and pointy, and metallic. Of course, the egg would not have used these adjectives.
Look! says Unni. A little hole!
Of course, we've all seen a little hole appearing.
It's getting bigger!
Yes, we've all seen that before. Get to the last part.
They watch, and drink their coffee.
The egg cracks open and a little baby Bristlebird's beak pokes out.
No, not that part. The part when it emerges fully!
At last! Here it is, in its entirety!
Oh how cute! says Unni. I wonder if they'll let you take it on the plane.
Beep! Imagine you have just come out into the world expecting to be in an ovoid ground nest, somewhere in a forest, with a mummy and a daddy who look a lot like you except with better feathers, and who have brought you food.....
........and instead, what you are faced with is an existential question.
Will they let me on the plane?
The baby's little face falls. It looks at Arthur, with its newly opened eyes.
Arthur is not cold hearted. He dips his finger in his coffee and holds his wet finger to the baby's beak.
The baby sucks up his first taste of coffee.
Hic squaw wee!
Already with the language skills! It is obvious the baby has a great deal of potential.
Wednesday, November 18, 2015
Those That Tremble As If They Were Mad
Mermaids? says Carl Linnaeus. But mermaids are fabled creatures.
Wait, says Hui Zhong. The next category is:
6. FABULOUS ONES
There you are, says Gaius. Could there be an overlap?
Overlap? says Carl. Oh I see, overlap. As in female top overlaps fishy bottom.
Exactly, says Gaius. So one can be both a mermaid, and a fabulous one.
Then why have two categories? asks the father of modern taxonomy.
You will see when I tell you the remaining eight categories, says Hui Zhong,
Mummy, says Mai-Mai, holding up her System of Vegetables. What does this look like?
A mole, says Hui Zhong, without hesitation.
It was better when it was an elephant, says Mai-Mai sadly.
Never mind, says her mummy. Why not give it a horn?
A horn? splutters Carl Linnaeus. What will that make it? A molicorn?
Mai-Mai laughs at the very idea of a molicorn.
Ah, here we are, says Hui Zhong, who has consulted her smart phone.
7. STRAY DOGS
8. THOSE THAT ARE INCLUDED IN THIS CLASSIFICATION
9. THOSE THAT TREMBLE AS IF THEY WERE MAD
I'm beginning to admire this system of classification, says Carl Linnaeus. Many animals tremble as if they were mad.
Indeed, says Gaius. I have often observed it.
( He recalls several instances where he has observed it. )
Hui Zhong continues:
10. INNUMERABLE ONES
11. THOSE DRAWN WITH A FINE CAMEL HAIR BRUSH
Mummy, I need a fine camel hair brush, says Mai-Mai.
No, Mai-Mai, says her mother. You must be satisfied with your new pencils.
12. ET CETERA
Et cetera! says Carl Linnaeus. Nothing is left out!
13. THOSE THAT HAVE JUST BROKEN THE FLOWER VASE
My personal favourite, says Hui Zhong.
Our cat did that once, says Mai-Mai
14. THOSE THAT AT A DISTANCE RESEMBLE FLIES
Most comprehensive, says Gaius.
.........
In Sydney Airport, at a distance from those you are meeting, flies are what they resemble.
And you resemble a fly to them too, if they're not short sighted.
Arthur and Pablo spot Unni just as she spots them.
Arthur, Pablo! cries Unni. It's so nice to see you!
Hello, Unni, says Pablo. This is Dries. He's come with us. He's one of the Twenty Persons.
I know all about the Twenty Persons, says Unni. Dad told me. I've brought you the egg.
This is wrong, says Dries. We are not having the egg. We are going to meet with your father and begin instructing the Bristlebirds.
So you don't know, says Unni.
That they're dead? guesses Arthur.
Yes, says Unni. This egg is the only thing we've got now. Dad wants you guys to have it. Keep it warm. It'll hatch soon.
She shoves it at Arthur.
Bad choice, thinks Arthur, taking the egg and dropping it into his pocket.
Ting!
The egg trembles as if it were mad.
Wait, says Hui Zhong. The next category is:
6. FABULOUS ONES
There you are, says Gaius. Could there be an overlap?
Overlap? says Carl. Oh I see, overlap. As in female top overlaps fishy bottom.
Exactly, says Gaius. So one can be both a mermaid, and a fabulous one.
Then why have two categories? asks the father of modern taxonomy.
You will see when I tell you the remaining eight categories, says Hui Zhong,
Mummy, says Mai-Mai, holding up her System of Vegetables. What does this look like?
A mole, says Hui Zhong, without hesitation.
It was better when it was an elephant, says Mai-Mai sadly.
Never mind, says her mummy. Why not give it a horn?
A horn? splutters Carl Linnaeus. What will that make it? A molicorn?
Mai-Mai laughs at the very idea of a molicorn.
Ah, here we are, says Hui Zhong, who has consulted her smart phone.
7. STRAY DOGS
8. THOSE THAT ARE INCLUDED IN THIS CLASSIFICATION
9. THOSE THAT TREMBLE AS IF THEY WERE MAD
I'm beginning to admire this system of classification, says Carl Linnaeus. Many animals tremble as if they were mad.
Indeed, says Gaius. I have often observed it.
( He recalls several instances where he has observed it. )
Hui Zhong continues:
10. INNUMERABLE ONES
11. THOSE DRAWN WITH A FINE CAMEL HAIR BRUSH
Mummy, I need a fine camel hair brush, says Mai-Mai.
No, Mai-Mai, says her mother. You must be satisfied with your new pencils.
12. ET CETERA
Et cetera! says Carl Linnaeus. Nothing is left out!
13. THOSE THAT HAVE JUST BROKEN THE FLOWER VASE
My personal favourite, says Hui Zhong.
Our cat did that once, says Mai-Mai
14. THOSE THAT AT A DISTANCE RESEMBLE FLIES
Most comprehensive, says Gaius.
.........
In Sydney Airport, at a distance from those you are meeting, flies are what they resemble.
And you resemble a fly to them too, if they're not short sighted.
Arthur and Pablo spot Unni just as she spots them.
Arthur, Pablo! cries Unni. It's so nice to see you!
Hello, Unni, says Pablo. This is Dries. He's come with us. He's one of the Twenty Persons.
I know all about the Twenty Persons, says Unni. Dad told me. I've brought you the egg.
This is wrong, says Dries. We are not having the egg. We are going to meet with your father and begin instructing the Bristlebirds.
So you don't know, says Unni.
That they're dead? guesses Arthur.
Yes, says Unni. This egg is the only thing we've got now. Dad wants you guys to have it. Keep it warm. It'll hatch soon.
She shoves it at Arthur.
Bad choice, thinks Arthur, taking the egg and dropping it into his pocket.
Ting!
The egg trembles as if it were mad.
Tuesday, November 17, 2015
Celestial Emporium Of Benevolent Knowedge
Mai-Mai has drawn up a column.
It's a crooked column, because she drew the radishes first, and some were bigger than others, and some had long tails.
She writes, at the head of the column: RADISHES (...........)
Alongside the RADISHES column, she draws up another column.
It has to be crooked as well. That is the nature of paper.
Red pencil poised at the head of the column, she hesitates.
What's not a radish? asks Mai-Mai.
A carrot, says Gaius.
Surely you are not going to divide your System of Vegetables into Radishes and Things That Aren't Radishes? says Carl Linnaeus. I should warn you, that would be foolish.
I meant not a real radish, says Mai-Mai. So, not a carrot, because if a carrot is a real carrot it can't just be not a real radish.
Good heavens, says her mother. I have spawned a genius in semantics.
I put it to you that it can, says Carl Linnaeus, ignoring semantics and addressing Mai-Mai, the budding botanist. I suggest you draw up several more columns, and use a ruler. Then I suggest you divide up your radishes into varieties. You have only just scratched the surface.
He's right, Mai-Mai, says Hui Zhong. For example what about the daikon? It needs a column.
No, says Mai-Mai. I've finished the radishes. My red's getting blunter and blunter.
Carrots are orange, says Gaius.
Why so keen on carrots? asks Carl.
I'm not, says Gaius I simply thought they were similar to radishes.
They are not similar, says Carl Linnaeus. They are an entirely different genus.
I know that, says Gaius. It was an artistic observation.
The Chinese have a different classification system, says Hui Zhong. Although for many years we didn't know it.
How can that be? asks Carl Linnaeus.
It was pointed out to us by a famous Argentinian novelist, says Hui Zhong. But it is only for animals.
Yes, animals! says Mai-Mai. Thanks ma!
She writes ANIMALS (............) at the head of the second column, and with a grey pencil, starts drawing an elephant.
It's not all that easy.
The ears look wrong. She turns it into a mouse.
Meanwhile, because Carl and Gaius have expressed an interest Hui Zhong tries to recall all 14 animal categories of the Celestial Emporium of Benevolent Knowledge, beginning with:
1. THOSE THAT BELONG TO THE EMPEROR
2. EMBALMED ONES
3. THOSE THAT ARE TRAINED
4. SUCKLING PIGS
5. MERMAIDS (or SIRENS)
It's a crooked column, because she drew the radishes first, and some were bigger than others, and some had long tails.
She writes, at the head of the column: RADISHES (...........)
Alongside the RADISHES column, she draws up another column.
It has to be crooked as well. That is the nature of paper.
Red pencil poised at the head of the column, she hesitates.
What's not a radish? asks Mai-Mai.
A carrot, says Gaius.
Surely you are not going to divide your System of Vegetables into Radishes and Things That Aren't Radishes? says Carl Linnaeus. I should warn you, that would be foolish.
I meant not a real radish, says Mai-Mai. So, not a carrot, because if a carrot is a real carrot it can't just be not a real radish.
Good heavens, says her mother. I have spawned a genius in semantics.
I put it to you that it can, says Carl Linnaeus, ignoring semantics and addressing Mai-Mai, the budding botanist. I suggest you draw up several more columns, and use a ruler. Then I suggest you divide up your radishes into varieties. You have only just scratched the surface.
He's right, Mai-Mai, says Hui Zhong. For example what about the daikon? It needs a column.
No, says Mai-Mai. I've finished the radishes. My red's getting blunter and blunter.
Carrots are orange, says Gaius.
Why so keen on carrots? asks Carl.
I'm not, says Gaius I simply thought they were similar to radishes.
They are not similar, says Carl Linnaeus. They are an entirely different genus.
I know that, says Gaius. It was an artistic observation.
The Chinese have a different classification system, says Hui Zhong. Although for many years we didn't know it.
How can that be? asks Carl Linnaeus.
It was pointed out to us by a famous Argentinian novelist, says Hui Zhong. But it is only for animals.
Yes, animals! says Mai-Mai. Thanks ma!
She writes ANIMALS (............) at the head of the second column, and with a grey pencil, starts drawing an elephant.
It's not all that easy.
The ears look wrong. She turns it into a mouse.
Meanwhile, because Carl and Gaius have expressed an interest Hui Zhong tries to recall all 14 animal categories of the Celestial Emporium of Benevolent Knowledge, beginning with:
1. THOSE THAT BELONG TO THE EMPEROR
2. EMBALMED ONES
3. THOSE THAT ARE TRAINED
4. SUCKLING PIGS
5. MERMAIDS (or SIRENS)
Monday, November 16, 2015
French Breakfast Is A Long One
Arthur, Pablo and Dries have now landed in Sydney, and finally learned of the terrible events which they avoided in Paris.
I guess we were lucky, says Dries. We could have been there. Instead, we were not there, but flying.
That's one way of looking at it, says Arthur, frowning. I wish I'd been there.
Dries looks shocked. But Pablo knows Arthur better than Dries does.
Explosions, says Pablo. Death. The gates of the unconscious, the unknowable, evil, visions, the future, madness, that's Arthur's oeuvre.
Dries looks unconvinced.
So does Arthur.
Pablo stiffens. Océane! What if SHE was one of the one hundred and twenty nine dead ones?
Call her, says Arthur.
No way, says Pablo. She was shitty with me.
Call Gaius, says Arthur. He'll know. But don't mention the Bristlebirds.
Why not? says Dries. You'd better not be thinking....
No, says Arthur. We're not thinking.
Pablo calls Gaius.
Gaius is in an art shop in Montmartre, buying a box of coloured pencils for Mai-Mai, who is in the art shop as well.
Hello? says Gaius.
It's me, Pablo, says Pablo. Is Océane.... I mean are you all right?
Yes, yes, says Gaius. I'm fine. I suppose it was Arthur that asked you to call me. The dear boy. Tell him I'm touched. Are you in Sydney?
Yes we are, says Pablo. By the way, is Océane all right?
Of course she is, says Gaius. She is not the sort of person to be out enjoying herself on a Friday evening.
Pablo let's that go by.
Let me know when you get to Ray's house, says Gaius. There is good news. An egg has been laid.
Sure, mutters Pablo, ending the call on a low note.
These ones are nice, says Mai-Mai, waving a box of 60 coloured pencils.
Jumping Jupiter! says Gaius. Look at the price!
Back at the hotel, Mai-Mai opens her box of twelve pencils.
Now, says Mai-Mai. Radishes first.
Would you like me to help you? asks Carl Linnaeus. I am the father of modern taxonomy. And radishes have their own special name.
Okay, says Mai-Mai. What is their special name?
Raphanus, says Carl Linnaeus.
What does it mean? asks Mai-Mai.
Raphanus means radish, says Carl Linnaeus. But there are different types with different shapes and colours and they all have their own names.
Mai-Mai draws a red circle. She gives it a face and a tail.
This one is called Cherry-Belle Raphanus, says Mai-Mai. The next one will be Purple Plum. After that, Bunny Tail. It's a long one.
Is Mai-Mai that clever? Or is she just lucky, coming up with those names?
I guess we were lucky, says Dries. We could have been there. Instead, we were not there, but flying.
That's one way of looking at it, says Arthur, frowning. I wish I'd been there.
Dries looks shocked. But Pablo knows Arthur better than Dries does.
Explosions, says Pablo. Death. The gates of the unconscious, the unknowable, evil, visions, the future, madness, that's Arthur's oeuvre.
Dries looks unconvinced.
So does Arthur.
Pablo stiffens. Océane! What if SHE was one of the one hundred and twenty nine dead ones?
Call her, says Arthur.
No way, says Pablo. She was shitty with me.
Call Gaius, says Arthur. He'll know. But don't mention the Bristlebirds.
Why not? says Dries. You'd better not be thinking....
No, says Arthur. We're not thinking.
Pablo calls Gaius.
Gaius is in an art shop in Montmartre, buying a box of coloured pencils for Mai-Mai, who is in the art shop as well.
Hello? says Gaius.
It's me, Pablo, says Pablo. Is Océane.... I mean are you all right?
Yes, yes, says Gaius. I'm fine. I suppose it was Arthur that asked you to call me. The dear boy. Tell him I'm touched. Are you in Sydney?
Yes we are, says Pablo. By the way, is Océane all right?
Of course she is, says Gaius. She is not the sort of person to be out enjoying herself on a Friday evening.
Pablo let's that go by.
Let me know when you get to Ray's house, says Gaius. There is good news. An egg has been laid.
Sure, mutters Pablo, ending the call on a low note.
These ones are nice, says Mai-Mai, waving a box of 60 coloured pencils.
Jumping Jupiter! says Gaius. Look at the price!
Back at the hotel, Mai-Mai opens her box of twelve pencils.
Now, says Mai-Mai. Radishes first.
Would you like me to help you? asks Carl Linnaeus. I am the father of modern taxonomy. And radishes have their own special name.
Okay, says Mai-Mai. What is their special name?
Raphanus, says Carl Linnaeus.
What does it mean? asks Mai-Mai.
Raphanus means radish, says Carl Linnaeus. But there are different types with different shapes and colours and they all have their own names.
Mai-Mai draws a red circle. She gives it a face and a tail.
This one is called Cherry-Belle Raphanus, says Mai-Mai. The next one will be Purple Plum. After that, Bunny Tail. It's a long one.
Is Mai-Mai that clever? Or is she just lucky, coming up with those names?
Sunday, November 15, 2015
Paris Morning: Candles and Radishes
Next morning, in the hotel Montmartre-St Pierre.
Grey light creeps through the window.
Three phones ring at once.
Carl Linnaeus answers his first.
You! says Carl Linnaeus. About time too. Yes, I'm fine. I should have seen it coming? What do you mean, boy? No one saw it coming. No. Yes. How is the jaundice? You should never have gone to London. Give my love to your mother. And .....thanks for the call, son. Goodbye.
He ends with a barely disguised air-kiss.
Meanwhile Hui Zhong is talking to Granny. Yes, Granny Zhong. No, Granny Zhong. Fine, Granny Zhong, that's your opinion. It's ECOLOGY, Granny Zhong. It's very important. We'll be staying.
Gaius is trying to return his missed call with fumbling fingers, having cut it off somehow.
Who was it anyway?
He hopes it was Arthur, using someone else's phone, because his battery (as usual) has died.
Hello? Gaius? It's Océane. I'm just outside. Are you all okay in there?
Of course, says Gaius. Come in, if you're out there.
No, I'm going out to buy candles, says Océane. You can all have the day off. See you tonight.
Who was that? asks Carl.
Océane, says Gaius. I was hoping it would be Arthur.
Is Arthur a relative? asks Carl Linnaeus.
My right hand man, says Gaius.
Oh, says Carl. That was my son who just called me. Carl Linnaeus the Younger.
Pretentious name, says Gaius.
You can talk, says Carl Linnaeus. Isn't your nephew Pliny the Younger?
Exactly, says Gaius.
The two famous men nod empathetically.
My son's a good lad, says Carl, but I must say he never quite lived up to.....expectations.
Did he publish? asks Gaius.
Yes, he published "Supplement of Plants: A System of Vegetables".
Well, that's certainly something, says Gaius.
What's a System of Vegetables? wonders Mai-Mai, looking up at the bed sheet.
If only she had a pencil.
She could start her own system, beginning with radishes, which are round, red, white, bitey.
She gets out from under the bed sheet and opens some drawers.
He was enrolled at Uppsala University at age nine, says Carl Linnaeus. Tutored by my best students. At twenty two he became a professor, and inherited my place as Head of Practical Medicine.
Hm, says Gaius.
Many people were of the same opinion, says Carl. Because he passed no exams.
Do either of you have a pencil? asks Hui Zhong. Mai-Mai wants to start her own System of Vegetables.
Carl and Gaius beam with the goodwill of the learned, who love to encourage scientific projects in the young.
But will either of them have a pencil?
You can bet that's not likely.
Grey light creeps through the window.
Three phones ring at once.
Carl Linnaeus answers his first.
You! says Carl Linnaeus. About time too. Yes, I'm fine. I should have seen it coming? What do you mean, boy? No one saw it coming. No. Yes. How is the jaundice? You should never have gone to London. Give my love to your mother. And .....thanks for the call, son. Goodbye.
He ends with a barely disguised air-kiss.
Meanwhile Hui Zhong is talking to Granny. Yes, Granny Zhong. No, Granny Zhong. Fine, Granny Zhong, that's your opinion. It's ECOLOGY, Granny Zhong. It's very important. We'll be staying.
Gaius is trying to return his missed call with fumbling fingers, having cut it off somehow.
Who was it anyway?
He hopes it was Arthur, using someone else's phone, because his battery (as usual) has died.
Hello? Gaius? It's Océane. I'm just outside. Are you all okay in there?
Of course, says Gaius. Come in, if you're out there.
No, I'm going out to buy candles, says Océane. You can all have the day off. See you tonight.
Who was that? asks Carl.
Océane, says Gaius. I was hoping it would be Arthur.
Is Arthur a relative? asks Carl Linnaeus.
My right hand man, says Gaius.
Oh, says Carl. That was my son who just called me. Carl Linnaeus the Younger.
Pretentious name, says Gaius.
You can talk, says Carl Linnaeus. Isn't your nephew Pliny the Younger?
Exactly, says Gaius.
The two famous men nod empathetically.
My son's a good lad, says Carl, but I must say he never quite lived up to.....expectations.
Did he publish? asks Gaius.
Yes, he published "Supplement of Plants: A System of Vegetables".
Well, that's certainly something, says Gaius.
What's a System of Vegetables? wonders Mai-Mai, looking up at the bed sheet.
If only she had a pencil.
She could start her own system, beginning with radishes, which are round, red, white, bitey.
She gets out from under the bed sheet and opens some drawers.
He was enrolled at Uppsala University at age nine, says Carl Linnaeus. Tutored by my best students. At twenty two he became a professor, and inherited my place as Head of Practical Medicine.
Hm, says Gaius.
Many people were of the same opinion, says Carl. Because he passed no exams.
Do either of you have a pencil? asks Hui Zhong. Mai-Mai wants to start her own System of Vegetables.
Carl and Gaius beam with the goodwill of the learned, who love to encourage scientific projects in the young.
But will either of them have a pencil?
You can bet that's not likely.
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