You're heartless too, says Belle. You only think of yourself.
No way! says Sweezus.
He is silent for a second, thinking.
Yeah well, the baby bird might still be alive. You even said so.
You can't have it both ways, says Belle. Either it was a sacrifice Arthur made for you, or it wasn't. I'm calling Unni. She might know what happened.
She calls Unni.
Hi Belle! says Unni. I was meaning to call you.
About that baby bird? How is it? I heard Arthur....um..... left it behind.
Yes, what a shit head. He left it in a coffee cup at the airport. But I rescued it and it's okay. I took it to Joshy, this guy I know who's a bird whisperer.
Fantastic, says Belle. So the story has a happy ending.
It's not over, says Unni. Josh has this macaw called Mango. He's taught her free flying.
Oh, lovely, says Belle, and has she adopted the baby?
Er no, says Unni. She's actually flying the baby over to Adelaide, to return him to Arthur.
Arthur! What for! asks Belle.
Well we found out that the baby thinks Arthur is his mother, says Unni. It's called imprinting. They fix on the first thing they see.
Ha ha, that's HILARIOUS! says Belle. When are they arriving?
It should take at least eight days, says Unni. Macaws fly at about 50 kilometres per hour.
She's actually flying! says Belle That is amazing! How's she carrying the baby?
In a leather contraption, says Unni. He'll be quite safe. We've given Mango the address of the Velosophy office. So if you guys could look out for them.....
Sure, says Belle. Thanks for the heads up. See you, Unni! Bye!
Guess what? says Belle.
I heard, says Sweezus.
You didn't hear the funniest bit, says Belle. The baby thinks Arthur's his mother.
That's not funny, says Sweezus. When are they coming?
Eight days, says Belle.
Sweezus thinks: Cool. Eight days to come up with a reason for us not to be here.
.........
Flap...flap...flap.
We're making good time, says Mango. That's because of not stopping. Look down, baby B-B.
Baby B-B looks down.
That's Harden. Used to be a big railway town.
Way-way, says baby B-B.
Town, says Mango. Way way town.
Way way town, says baby B-B.
Remarkable! Town is not easy to say (it has three consonants)
I know I said I wasn't stopping, says Mango. But you deserve a reward.
Not marshmallow again, hopes baby B-B.
Not marshmallow, says Mango. Cherries. They grow cherries down there.
She lands in a cherry orchard in Harden.
Now Mango and baby B-B are munching on cherries. Red juice runs down the golden breast feathers of Mango.
Look at me, says Mango, I've turned into a hypothetical.
Wat-sat? asks baby B-B ( another first, a double syllable question!)
I knew you'd ask, says Mango. We macaws lay claim to a number of hypothetical extinct species that naturalists think must have existed. One is the Violet Macaw. That's who I look like. It'll wash off though. If I was a real one, it wouldn't.
Baby B-B wonders if he looks like a Violet baby. (He doesn't).
Shall we get moving? says Mango. Hop in to your leather contraption.
Baby B-B hops in.
We'll be there in five days at this rate, says Mango.
FIVE days? But Belle told Sweezus EIGHT.
Let's hope there is a reason for this discrepancy.
Saturday, November 28, 2015
Friday, November 27, 2015
Two Ways Of Viewing The Ultimate Sacrifice
Mango is about to take off from Boorowa.
She takes a last look at the roadside painting.
Superb Parrots are greedy, says Mango. This one is thin, so you get the wrong impression.
Wah? asks baby B-B.
I'll tell you a story, says Mango. Before we take off. Know why I'm going to tell you?
Eh! Wah? says baby B-B.
So this THIN parrot hears it, says Mango.
Even baby B-B knows the painted parrot won't hear it. But he would like to hear it.
Once, says Mango, I think it was 2008, there was a grain spill on the road in Boorowa. And the Superb Parrots came down from the trees and stuffed themselves silly. They were so full they couldn't fly up when a truck or a car came. Result. They all got run over. Ha ha.
The Superb Parrot remains superbly indifferent to this story.
It's just an old story.
Baby B-B hears a truck coming. He hopes Mango takes off pretty soon.
Mango takes off, with scarcely a wink at the thin painted parrot.
Goodbye Boorowa.
Flap...flap...flap.
As baby B-B rocks in the air in his leather contraption, he reviews what he has learned so far.
1. He can now do two impressions ( a camera, a cash register)
2: He knows what a PUN is ( it's a dangerous predator)
3: He knows what a church is for (sheep)
4; He knows how easily you can choke on a marshmallow
5: He knows how Superb Parrots die
He practises ( under his breath ) his mobile phone impression ( bliiiing! no, that's not right....)
The afternoon sun is warm. The wheat fields below them send up heady wheat-perfumed projections.
Let us leave them flying west for a while.......
Let's arrive at their destination, several days before they do.
Let's see what has happened to Arthur and Pablo and Dries.
Have they resolved their dilemma?
Yeah, says Sweezus. It was easy. It was basic logic.
Is that right? says Belle. I don't follow. Explain it to me again.
Dries paid Arthur four hundred euro for the bicycle, says Sweezus.
It wasn't Arthur's bicycle, says Belle.
I know, says Sweezus. That's why Dries didn't have to pay him real money. Arthur gets to keep the four hundred euro that he got from the Twenty Persons Committee, in lieu.
Something's wrong with that, says Belle. But if Dries is happy.....
He's stoked, says Sweezus. He gets to ride in the Tour Down Under.
He's not that good a rider, says Belle.
Yeah well, I'm kind of doing this for Arthur, says Sweezus. Because he left that baby Bristlebird to die in the coffee cup for my sake.
Heartless, says Belle, frowning. That poor little baby.
No way heartless! says Sweezus. He did it for ME. I was blown away!
She takes a last look at the roadside painting.
Superb Parrots are greedy, says Mango. This one is thin, so you get the wrong impression.
Wah? asks baby B-B.
I'll tell you a story, says Mango. Before we take off. Know why I'm going to tell you?
Eh! Wah? says baby B-B.
So this THIN parrot hears it, says Mango.
Even baby B-B knows the painted parrot won't hear it. But he would like to hear it.
Once, says Mango, I think it was 2008, there was a grain spill on the road in Boorowa. And the Superb Parrots came down from the trees and stuffed themselves silly. They were so full they couldn't fly up when a truck or a car came. Result. They all got run over. Ha ha.
The Superb Parrot remains superbly indifferent to this story.
It's just an old story.
Baby B-B hears a truck coming. He hopes Mango takes off pretty soon.
Mango takes off, with scarcely a wink at the thin painted parrot.
Goodbye Boorowa.
Flap...flap...flap.
As baby B-B rocks in the air in his leather contraption, he reviews what he has learned so far.
1. He can now do two impressions ( a camera, a cash register)
2: He knows what a PUN is ( it's a dangerous predator)
3: He knows what a church is for (sheep)
4; He knows how easily you can choke on a marshmallow
5: He knows how Superb Parrots die
He practises ( under his breath ) his mobile phone impression ( bliiiing! no, that's not right....)
The afternoon sun is warm. The wheat fields below them send up heady wheat-perfumed projections.
Let us leave them flying west for a while.......
Let's arrive at their destination, several days before they do.
Let's see what has happened to Arthur and Pablo and Dries.
Have they resolved their dilemma?
Yeah, says Sweezus. It was easy. It was basic logic.
Is that right? says Belle. I don't follow. Explain it to me again.
Dries paid Arthur four hundred euro for the bicycle, says Sweezus.
It wasn't Arthur's bicycle, says Belle.
I know, says Sweezus. That's why Dries didn't have to pay him real money. Arthur gets to keep the four hundred euro that he got from the Twenty Persons Committee, in lieu.
Something's wrong with that, says Belle. But if Dries is happy.....
He's stoked, says Sweezus. He gets to ride in the Tour Down Under.
He's not that good a rider, says Belle.
Yeah well, I'm kind of doing this for Arthur, says Sweezus. Because he left that baby Bristlebird to die in the coffee cup for my sake.
Heartless, says Belle, frowning. That poor little baby.
No way heartless! says Sweezus. He did it for ME. I was blown away!
Thursday, November 26, 2015
Sheep Worship: A Pun In There Somewhere
Flap...flap...flap.
Mango flies over Laggan, a small village.
Lights, says Mango. See that. That must be Laggan.
Baby B-B peers out through gold feathers and into the darkness.
Laggan looks tiny. He hopes they don't land there.
I'm not going to land there, says Mango. I wouldn't. Want to know why? Course you do.
Flap...flap...flap.
Why doesn't she tell him?
Eh? squeaks baby B-B.
Ask me WHY, says Mango.
Wah? says baby B-B.
Good try, says Mango. It's time you learned another impression. I do mobile phones.
Wah? says baby B-B.
No, wait till I do it, says Mango. Briiiing! Briiiing! Of course there are many different ring tones. But I prefer that one.
Baby B-B is confused. Why aren't they stopping in Laggan?
He determines to practice his ring tones. Maybe then he'll find out.
Flap...flap...flap.
The moon has gone now.
The sky is rose pink at the edges.
Mango flies steadily towards Boorowa.
Baby B-B, safe in his leather contraption, is saying over and over: Biiing! Biiing!
What's that? says Mango. A cash register?
Baby B-B falls silent. Mobile phones are too hard.
I'm going to land in Boorowa, says Mango. I want your opinion. Up to you to let me know what it is.
She lands on a painted sign at the side of the road just outside Boorowa.
The dawn light reveals it.
WELCOME TO BOOROWA
Superb Parrots, Superb Country.
And a painted Superb Parrot, in all its glory. (Blue, green, red, yellow.)
Look at that? says Mango. What do you think?
Baby B-B can't see, at that angle.
He looks up into the big beady eyes of Mango, with his small beady eyes.
Silent messages pass between them.
You are more beautiful!
Of course. You are a good little learner.
Now will you tell me why we weren't stopping in Laggan?
Has that been worrying you, all this time?
Yes, is it something terrible? Like a predator?
No, nothing like that. Goodness me, I'd almost forgotten. It's not even important.
It is to me.
Okay. We didn't stop because it's weird there. There's a church....
What's a church, Mango?
I haven't finished, baby B-B. A church is a place of worship.
Worship.
Yes, and this church has been converted into a shearing shed. For shearing sheep.
Sheep!
Yes there's a pun in there somewhere. Shall we be going?
Baby B-B nods. There's a PUN back there, in Laggan. And Mango has saved them, by not stopping.
Mango flies over Laggan, a small village.
Lights, says Mango. See that. That must be Laggan.
Baby B-B peers out through gold feathers and into the darkness.
Laggan looks tiny. He hopes they don't land there.
I'm not going to land there, says Mango. I wouldn't. Want to know why? Course you do.
Flap...flap...flap.
Why doesn't she tell him?
Eh? squeaks baby B-B.
Ask me WHY, says Mango.
Wah? says baby B-B.
Good try, says Mango. It's time you learned another impression. I do mobile phones.
Wah? says baby B-B.
No, wait till I do it, says Mango. Briiiing! Briiiing! Of course there are many different ring tones. But I prefer that one.
Baby B-B is confused. Why aren't they stopping in Laggan?
He determines to practice his ring tones. Maybe then he'll find out.
Flap...flap...flap.
The moon has gone now.
The sky is rose pink at the edges.
Mango flies steadily towards Boorowa.
Baby B-B, safe in his leather contraption, is saying over and over: Biiing! Biiing!
What's that? says Mango. A cash register?
Baby B-B falls silent. Mobile phones are too hard.
I'm going to land in Boorowa, says Mango. I want your opinion. Up to you to let me know what it is.
She lands on a painted sign at the side of the road just outside Boorowa.
The dawn light reveals it.
WELCOME TO BOOROWA
Superb Parrots, Superb Country.
And a painted Superb Parrot, in all its glory. (Blue, green, red, yellow.)
Look at that? says Mango. What do you think?
Baby B-B can't see, at that angle.
He looks up into the big beady eyes of Mango, with his small beady eyes.
Silent messages pass between them.
You are more beautiful!
Of course. You are a good little learner.
Now will you tell me why we weren't stopping in Laggan?
Has that been worrying you, all this time?
Yes, is it something terrible? Like a predator?
No, nothing like that. Goodness me, I'd almost forgotten. It's not even important.
It is to me.
Okay. We didn't stop because it's weird there. There's a church....
What's a church, Mango?
I haven't finished, baby B-B. A church is a place of worship.
Worship.
Yes, and this church has been converted into a shearing shed. For shearing sheep.
Sheep!
Yes there's a pun in there somewhere. Shall we be going?
Baby B-B nods. There's a PUN back there, in Laggan. And Mango has saved them, by not stopping.
Wednesday, November 25, 2015
The Moon And The Map Of A Hole
The smoke from the camp fire rises, drifting across the high moon.
The campers are engaged in a dietary conversation.
Beta carotene, says one of the campers. That would be carrots.
Actually, says Mango, on second thoughts, I'm not used to carrots. Have you got any seeds?
I have some sunflower seeds, says the motherly camper.
She opens a tin.
Mango picks out one or two.
Thanks, says Mango. I like to eat seeds in the wild. And nuts, fruits and berries. Of course some of them turn out to be toxic. It's not funny. Then I have to eat clay.
Clay! says a five year old camper. I used to eat clay. Mum said not to.
I'm a Macaw, says Mango. We are different from humans. Look at my toes.
It's true. Her first and fourth toes point backwards.
Wow, says the five year old camper. Does that mean you can walk backwards?
I suppose so, says Mango. Never tried. Unless you count dancing. And there I admit, I'm out of practice. What do you think of my feathers?
Turn around, says a camper. I like the blue ones.
Spread them, says another.
How rude. Whatever for?
Mango straightens and realises her golden breast feathers are sticky.
I'm sticky, says Mango. Anyone got a wipe?
I have, says the motherly camper. ( She has everything. She even had carrots.)
Oh dear, says the motherly camper. Your baby's been sick.
It's true baby B-B, ignored for too long, has choked on the burnt flakes of marshmallow and thrown up in spectacular fashion.
The motherly camper smells faintly of coffee. As he is wiped, baby B-B begins to feel better.
Ma-ma, squeaks baby B-B. Ker-lick-tick, he adds bravely.
Oh, how CUTE! says the motherly camper. He sounds just like a camera.
I taught him that. Well, better be off now, says Mango. Straight on till morning!
Surely you're not flying all through the night? says a camper.
Oh yes, says Mango. The moon will light our way. Anyone got a map?
I have a map of the whole of Australia, says a dad camper.
Never mind, says Mango. Just tell me which way is west.
That way, says the dad camper, pointing towards Laggan.
Mango tightens the leather contraption in which baby B-B is resting, recovering, and thinking of Arthur, his blue-eyed mother.
Mango takes off.
Her shadow blocks the moon briefly.
Tch! says Mango, when they are well out of earshot of the campers.
I think we can do without a map of the Hole of Australia!
The campers are engaged in a dietary conversation.
Beta carotene, says one of the campers. That would be carrots.
Actually, says Mango, on second thoughts, I'm not used to carrots. Have you got any seeds?
I have some sunflower seeds, says the motherly camper.
She opens a tin.
Mango picks out one or two.
Thanks, says Mango. I like to eat seeds in the wild. And nuts, fruits and berries. Of course some of them turn out to be toxic. It's not funny. Then I have to eat clay.
Clay! says a five year old camper. I used to eat clay. Mum said not to.
I'm a Macaw, says Mango. We are different from humans. Look at my toes.
It's true. Her first and fourth toes point backwards.
Wow, says the five year old camper. Does that mean you can walk backwards?
I suppose so, says Mango. Never tried. Unless you count dancing. And there I admit, I'm out of practice. What do you think of my feathers?
Turn around, says a camper. I like the blue ones.
Spread them, says another.
How rude. Whatever for?
Mango straightens and realises her golden breast feathers are sticky.
I'm sticky, says Mango. Anyone got a wipe?
I have, says the motherly camper. ( She has everything. She even had carrots.)
Oh dear, says the motherly camper. Your baby's been sick.
It's true baby B-B, ignored for too long, has choked on the burnt flakes of marshmallow and thrown up in spectacular fashion.
The motherly camper smells faintly of coffee. As he is wiped, baby B-B begins to feel better.
Ma-ma, squeaks baby B-B. Ker-lick-tick, he adds bravely.
Oh, how CUTE! says the motherly camper. He sounds just like a camera.
I taught him that. Well, better be off now, says Mango. Straight on till morning!
Surely you're not flying all through the night? says a camper.
Oh yes, says Mango. The moon will light our way. Anyone got a map?
I have a map of the whole of Australia, says a dad camper.
Never mind, says Mango. Just tell me which way is west.
That way, says the dad camper, pointing towards Laggan.
Mango tightens the leather contraption in which baby B-B is resting, recovering, and thinking of Arthur, his blue-eyed mother.
Mango takes off.
Her shadow blocks the moon briefly.
Tch! says Mango, when they are well out of earshot of the campers.
I think we can do without a map of the Hole of Australia!
Tuesday, November 24, 2015
A Splendid Impression Of A Camera
Mango is talking to a small group of children on the ferry.
We're on our way to Adelaide, says Mango. Yes, flying.
It's a long way, says a kid. We went to Adelaide. I was sick in the back of dad's car.
The ferry smells of metal.
Baby B-B feels sick in the leather contraption, under Mango's gold feathers.
Is he your baby? asks another kid.
No, not my baby. He's a Bristlebird. I'm a Macaw. That's why I'm the one doing the talking. I also do impressions. Want me to do one?
Yes! Yes! cry the children.
Mango does her impression of the sound of a camera. Ker-lick-tick!
That's good, says the kid who was sick in the back of dad's car.
Well, got to be going! says Mango. Don't suppose you could point me in a westerly direction?
This does not augur well for the rest of the journey.
Luckily baby B-B is too young to realise that Mango does not have an unerring sense of direction.
......
Mango flies over Camden. A historic town.
Look down there, says Mango. That's Camden, that is. Know how I know?
Ker-lick-tick! says baby B-B, who has been practising quietly.
That's right! I've seen an aerial photo. Mind you they all look the same..... But hey hey hey! That was a splendid impression!
Baby B-B is only a few hours old. It is quite remarkable that he has already learned to do an impression.
He deserves a reward.
I'll stop when we get to some smoke, says Mango. Smoke, do you know what that means? No, you don't. Smoke means a camp fire and a camp fire means marshmallows.
Ma-ma, says baby B-B.
Sweetness, says Mango.
It is unclear whether this is an endearment or further enlightenment as to the nature of marshmallows.
It is getting late now. The moon gleams on the darkening landscape.
Flap..flap..flap. Over Lake Burragorang.
Smoke! Mango lands next to a camp fire in a camp site near Wombeyan limestone caves.
People are laughing, and toasting marshmallows.
Hello all, says Mango. Got a spare marshmallow for my baby? Of course, being a Macaw, I don't want one.
A little kid gives Mango a burnt one.
Here you are, says Mango. Get your beak into that, little chickadee. Mm-mm.
What about you, you dear thoughtful bird? asks a motherly person. What do you eat?
Oh, anything rich in beta carotene, says Mango.
We're on our way to Adelaide, says Mango. Yes, flying.
It's a long way, says a kid. We went to Adelaide. I was sick in the back of dad's car.
The ferry smells of metal.
Baby B-B feels sick in the leather contraption, under Mango's gold feathers.
Is he your baby? asks another kid.
No, not my baby. He's a Bristlebird. I'm a Macaw. That's why I'm the one doing the talking. I also do impressions. Want me to do one?
Yes! Yes! cry the children.
Mango does her impression of the sound of a camera. Ker-lick-tick!
That's good, says the kid who was sick in the back of dad's car.
Well, got to be going! says Mango. Don't suppose you could point me in a westerly direction?
This does not augur well for the rest of the journey.
Luckily baby B-B is too young to realise that Mango does not have an unerring sense of direction.
......
Mango flies over Camden. A historic town.
Look down there, says Mango. That's Camden, that is. Know how I know?
Ker-lick-tick! says baby B-B, who has been practising quietly.
That's right! I've seen an aerial photo. Mind you they all look the same..... But hey hey hey! That was a splendid impression!
Baby B-B is only a few hours old. It is quite remarkable that he has already learned to do an impression.
He deserves a reward.
I'll stop when we get to some smoke, says Mango. Smoke, do you know what that means? No, you don't. Smoke means a camp fire and a camp fire means marshmallows.
Ma-ma, says baby B-B.
Sweetness, says Mango.
It is unclear whether this is an endearment or further enlightenment as to the nature of marshmallows.
It is getting late now. The moon gleams on the darkening landscape.
Flap..flap..flap. Over Lake Burragorang.
Smoke! Mango lands next to a camp fire in a camp site near Wombeyan limestone caves.
People are laughing, and toasting marshmallows.
Hello all, says Mango. Got a spare marshmallow for my baby? Of course, being a Macaw, I don't want one.
A little kid gives Mango a burnt one.
Here you are, says Mango. Get your beak into that, little chickadee. Mm-mm.
What about you, you dear thoughtful bird? asks a motherly person. What do you eat?
Oh, anything rich in beta carotene, says Mango.
Monday, November 23, 2015
Mango And Baby B-B
So what's this crisis? asks Sweezus. The Bristlebirds are cactus?
No, that crisis was resolved, says Dries. They left behind a baby. And that was a good thing.
A good thing? Yeah, right. Sweezus waits to hear why.
Dries continues:
A good thing because with the baby, Arthur and Pablo could fulfil their contract.
No kidding! sniggers Sweezus. These guys signed a contract?
Yes, says Dries. So then they are keeping the four hundred euro. But in Sydney the baby bird is suddenly left behind by a crazy decision of Arthur. So I think they are not entitled to be keeping the four hundred euro.
Arthur, says Belle, where did you leave it?
I've still got most of it, says Arthur.
Most of it? says Belle. The baby bird is in pieces?
No, the money, says Arthur. The baby bird's at the bottom of a coffee cup.
So it could still be alive, says Belle.
It could be, says Arthur.
........
In fact, at this minute, back in Sydney, baby Bristlebird is commencing a journey.
See ya, Mango, says Josh. Here's the address. Don't lose it.
No worries, says Mango. See you in about sixteen days.
No need to knock yourself out, Mango, says Josh.
No worries, Joshy, says Mango.
Mango flies up and over the front fence of Josh's garden, with baby Bristlebird in some sort of leather contraption, strapped under her golden breast feathers.
You're trusting, says Unni.
If you love someone, let them go, says Josh. She'll be back. Macaws are heaps smart. Smart as a five year old human.
Really? That smart! says Unni.
Mango flies over Sydney Harbour.
See that bridge? says Mango.
No-o, squeaks baby B-B.
Stick your head out, says Mango. That thing, that's a bridge. Want to fly under it?
No-o! squeaks baby B-B.
Mango flies under it.
Baby B-B didn't like that, not even one tiny bit.
He wants some coffee.
Ma-ma! says baby B-B. Ma-ma!
Arthur, says Mango. You want Arthur. Say ARTHUR.
Arh! says baby B-B. But he still wants coffee.
This trip could take eight days, says Mango, chattily. If I don't stop, that is. But I always stop if I see a nice group of people.
She flies over a harbour side restaurant. Baby B-B smells coffee.
Ma-ma! says baby B-B.
Oh, you want coffee? says Mango. It's bad for you. I'm not stopping. Look, a ferry! Want to land on it?
No-o! squeaks baby B-B.
Mango lands on a stinky old ferry.
What a nightmare this trip's going to be!
No, that crisis was resolved, says Dries. They left behind a baby. And that was a good thing.
A good thing? Yeah, right. Sweezus waits to hear why.
Dries continues:
A good thing because with the baby, Arthur and Pablo could fulfil their contract.
No kidding! sniggers Sweezus. These guys signed a contract?
Yes, says Dries. So then they are keeping the four hundred euro. But in Sydney the baby bird is suddenly left behind by a crazy decision of Arthur. So I think they are not entitled to be keeping the four hundred euro.
Arthur, says Belle, where did you leave it?
I've still got most of it, says Arthur.
Most of it? says Belle. The baby bird is in pieces?
No, the money, says Arthur. The baby bird's at the bottom of a coffee cup.
So it could still be alive, says Belle.
It could be, says Arthur.
........
In fact, at this minute, back in Sydney, baby Bristlebird is commencing a journey.
See ya, Mango, says Josh. Here's the address. Don't lose it.
No worries, says Mango. See you in about sixteen days.
No need to knock yourself out, Mango, says Josh.
No worries, Joshy, says Mango.
Mango flies up and over the front fence of Josh's garden, with baby Bristlebird in some sort of leather contraption, strapped under her golden breast feathers.
You're trusting, says Unni.
If you love someone, let them go, says Josh. She'll be back. Macaws are heaps smart. Smart as a five year old human.
Really? That smart! says Unni.
Mango flies over Sydney Harbour.
See that bridge? says Mango.
No-o, squeaks baby B-B.
Stick your head out, says Mango. That thing, that's a bridge. Want to fly under it?
No-o! squeaks baby B-B.
Mango flies under it.
Baby B-B didn't like that, not even one tiny bit.
He wants some coffee.
Ma-ma! says baby B-B. Ma-ma!
Arthur, says Mango. You want Arthur. Say ARTHUR.
Arh! says baby B-B. But he still wants coffee.
This trip could take eight days, says Mango, chattily. If I don't stop, that is. But I always stop if I see a nice group of people.
She flies over a harbour side restaurant. Baby B-B smells coffee.
Ma-ma! says baby B-B.
Oh, you want coffee? says Mango. It's bad for you. I'm not stopping. Look, a ferry! Want to land on it?
No-o! squeaks baby B-B.
Mango lands on a stinky old ferry.
What a nightmare this trip's going to be!
Sunday, November 22, 2015
Bird Whisperer
There are no insects in the airport. Not ones you might notice, or catch.
Unni buys a seeded roll at Pie Face, and picks a few seeds from the top.
Try this, baby, she says placing a seed on the tip of her finger.
The baby Bristlebird turns its small head away.
A tear plops from his eye into Unni's hand and trickles down to her elbow.
What? says Unni sharply.
She has no patience with precious behaviour.
The baby Bristlebird has no patience with humans except for his mother.
Where is she?
He looks around the airport in panic. His little heart begins to beat faster.
Damn. But wait a minute, Unni has a brainwave. Why not call Josh? He lives in Sydney.
She calls him, and half an hour later she knocks on the door of his house.
Josh opens the door, with a mango-coloured macaw on his shoulder.
This is Mango, says Josh. Where's the patient?
Here, says Unni, thrusting baby Bristlebird forward.
Mango has a good squiz at the baby.
Ha ha, laughs Josh. Having a good squiz are you, Mango?
Eh-eh, squawks Mango.
Josh is a Bird Whisperer, as you may have gathered.
First though, he offers Unni a cup of green tea.
While they are drinking the tea, Mango tries to get through to the baby.
M-A-N-G-O, says Mango, in Macaw.
B-B, says baby Bristlebird, in Bristlebird.
A kind of awkward rapport develops.
Ma-Ma? asks Mango. (She is asking B-B about his mother.)
Ma, says B-B. ( He is replying.)
From this Mango intuits that the baby is missing its mother.
Josh comes over.
What do we reckon? asks Josh.
Give me time, whispers Mango. So far I've established that the B-B is missing its mother. As to who that is, I have no idea yet.
Josh goes back to where Unni, is drinking the last drops of green tea.
It's missing its mother, says Josh.
I suppose that's pretty obvious, says Unni. Both parents died before it hatched out of its egg.
Who did it first lay eyes on? asks Josh. Was it you?
No, not me, says Unni. It was Arthur.
Then Arthur's his mother, says Josh. You should see if Arthur is willing to raise him.
Mango is pleased that the mother's identity is established.
Ma-Ma, A-R-T-H-U-R, says Mango, to B-B.
But B-B doesn't make the connections.
Okay, thanks, says Unni. So.... is it legal to send Bristlebirds interstate?
Birds go wherever, says Josh. Where's this Arthur?
Adelaide, says Unni.
At least he should be by now.
And he is.
The plane has landed in Adelaide.
Sweezus is waiting, with Belle.
Guys! says Sweezus.
Arthur, Pablo, says Belle, welcome home. And you must be Dries. How nice to meet you. Am I right you're from Belgium?
Yes, says Dries. I am. We are in the middle of a crisis.
Yeah, it's pretty shit, says Sweezus.
Yes, it's awful, says Belle.
How do you know? asks Arthur.
Its all over the news, says Belle. Brussels is in lockdown.
Ha ha, laughs Pablo.
Pablo! says Belle.
Wrong crisis, says Pablo. This is an Arthur-driven crisis. Involving a moral dilemma, a difficult decision, and the ultimate sacrifice of a newly hatched bird.
And a broken contract, adds Dries.
Everyone frowns and looks serious.
Unni buys a seeded roll at Pie Face, and picks a few seeds from the top.
Try this, baby, she says placing a seed on the tip of her finger.
The baby Bristlebird turns its small head away.
A tear plops from his eye into Unni's hand and trickles down to her elbow.
What? says Unni sharply.
She has no patience with precious behaviour.
The baby Bristlebird has no patience with humans except for his mother.
Where is she?
He looks around the airport in panic. His little heart begins to beat faster.
Damn. But wait a minute, Unni has a brainwave. Why not call Josh? He lives in Sydney.
She calls him, and half an hour later she knocks on the door of his house.
Josh opens the door, with a mango-coloured macaw on his shoulder.
This is Mango, says Josh. Where's the patient?
Here, says Unni, thrusting baby Bristlebird forward.
Mango has a good squiz at the baby.
Ha ha, laughs Josh. Having a good squiz are you, Mango?
Eh-eh, squawks Mango.
Josh is a Bird Whisperer, as you may have gathered.
First though, he offers Unni a cup of green tea.
While they are drinking the tea, Mango tries to get through to the baby.
M-A-N-G-O, says Mango, in Macaw.
B-B, says baby Bristlebird, in Bristlebird.
A kind of awkward rapport develops.
Ma-Ma? asks Mango. (She is asking B-B about his mother.)
Ma, says B-B. ( He is replying.)
From this Mango intuits that the baby is missing its mother.
Josh comes over.
What do we reckon? asks Josh.
Give me time, whispers Mango. So far I've established that the B-B is missing its mother. As to who that is, I have no idea yet.
Josh goes back to where Unni, is drinking the last drops of green tea.
It's missing its mother, says Josh.
I suppose that's pretty obvious, says Unni. Both parents died before it hatched out of its egg.
Who did it first lay eyes on? asks Josh. Was it you?
No, not me, says Unni. It was Arthur.
Then Arthur's his mother, says Josh. You should see if Arthur is willing to raise him.
Mango is pleased that the mother's identity is established.
Ma-Ma, A-R-T-H-U-R, says Mango, to B-B.
But B-B doesn't make the connections.
Okay, thanks, says Unni. So.... is it legal to send Bristlebirds interstate?
Birds go wherever, says Josh. Where's this Arthur?
Adelaide, says Unni.
At least he should be by now.
And he is.
The plane has landed in Adelaide.
Sweezus is waiting, with Belle.
Guys! says Sweezus.
Arthur, Pablo, says Belle, welcome home. And you must be Dries. How nice to meet you. Am I right you're from Belgium?
Yes, says Dries. I am. We are in the middle of a crisis.
Yeah, it's pretty shit, says Sweezus.
Yes, it's awful, says Belle.
How do you know? asks Arthur.
Its all over the news, says Belle. Brussels is in lockdown.
Ha ha, laughs Pablo.
Pablo! says Belle.
Wrong crisis, says Pablo. This is an Arthur-driven crisis. Involving a moral dilemma, a difficult decision, and the ultimate sacrifice of a newly hatched bird.
And a broken contract, adds Dries.
Everyone frowns and looks serious.
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