Conversations in the Dead Zone

Sweezus and Irma had been sent to the Dead Zone, leaving Emma to fight on alone.

Stupid rule, muttered Sweezus. That means our team has already lost.

No, Emma will beat them, said Irma. She has a fail-safe game plan.

What is it? asked Sweezus.

You'll see, said Irma. Just wait.

They waited. Nothing happened outside of the Dead Zone.

Nothing's happening, said Sweezus, impatiently.

That's her plan, said Irma.

How much are we paying for this? asked Sweezus.

It's free, said Irma. Free for Professor Freud's friends. Last year we had Wittgenstein here. He was a philosopher. Are you a philosopher?

No, said Sweezus. I'm a writer, and a tweeter.

That's not as good as a philosopher, said Irma. Wittgenstein had a brilliant philosophy. Do you want to know what it was?

Yep, said Sweezus. What was it?

It was 'The world is everything that is the case', said Irma.

You're kidding, said Sweezus. How is that a philosophy?

He said it was the philosophy to end all philosophies, said Irma.

Hang on, said Sweezus, what about things that don't happen?

Like what? said Irma. Nothing doesn't happen.

Yes it does, said Sweezus. It's happening right now.

Irma looked impressed.