It Is Not Always Advisable To Wear Crocs

Dr Minchen Chow and Professor Lanpo Jia are discussing finances.

I forgot to ask for a deposit, says Professor Lanpo Jia. Did you get one from Arthur?

No, no, says Dr Minchen Chow. But I negotiated a good daily rate. Twenty kuai.

Professor Lanpo Jia strikes himself on the forehead. He has not struck a rate.

It all happened so quickly, says Professor Lanpo Jia. Still, I suppose Sikong Shu will be good for it.

Oh yes, agrees Doctor Minchen Chow.  He will be good for it. Now let us go up to the tea room. If we are lucky the ladies will have left us a few preserved plums.

They begin the long climb up the stairs.

.........

Arthur and Sikong Shu are riding down Xizhimenwai Street away from the Institute.

I could have ridden behind you, says Sikong Shu. On the rear carrier.

I know, says Arthur. But this is better. We have a bike each.

It will cost more, says Sikong Shu. How much are you paying?

Nothing, says Arthur. I'll get out of it.

I don't see how you can do that, says Sikong Shu.

Don't be a prick, says Arthur.

Sikong Shu is silent. He would have liked to ride behind Arthur, his arms round his waist.....and Arthur has called him a prick. It is all going pear shaped already.

Cheer up, says Arthur. What's to see in Beijing?

The Birds Nest? says Sikong Shu sulkily.

Birds Nest it is, says Arthur.

I'll take you via the hutongs, says Sikong Shu.

Hutongs, says Arthur. What are hutongs?

You'll find out, says Sikong Shu.

..........

Gaius and Dr Zhu Min emerge from Dr Zhu Min's office.

Now, remember, says Dr Zhu Min. If anyone asks you, you found nothing.

I pride myself on being truthful, says Gaius.

I don't know how you can say that, says Dr Zhu Min.

Gaius is offended. What can Dr Zhu Min mean?

I mean, says Dr Zhu Min, that many statements you made in your Natural Histories are untrue.

There is a world of difference, says Gaius, between lying and getting it wrong.

That is certainly true, says Doctor Zhu Min. But if I remember correctly, you said it was Margaret who found all the specimens. So it would not be lying to say that you hadn't found anything. To say that you had would be getting it wrong.

I don't like this at all, says Gaius. You say you want me to..... and yet.....

One just has to be careful, says Dr Zhu Min. And another thing.... do you have alternative footwear?

Footwear! splutters Gaius.  These are Chinese crocs! I understood they were solely responsible for my so-called rehabilitation!

Unfortunately, circumstances....... begins Dr Zhu Min.

They are just passing the staircase when the ascending heads of Doctor Minchen Chow and Professor Lanpo Jia become level with the floor........