Vaseline Or Remember Your Mission

What happens happens.

Sweezus is right.

This is what happens.

He goes down to the beach, looks out to where Surfing-With-Whales is waiting on a wave with several group members and remembers the second best surfboard is back in the van.

And Nietzsche has gone back to the van with Lauren to see to his rash.

Better wait till they come out again.

He sits down on the sand facing the ramp, observing the van.

Nietzsche and Lauren emerge after several long minutes. Nietzsche first. He's walking funny.

Lauren spots Sweezus sitting down on the beach.

She knows what that means. He's waiting for a surfboard.

She makes the sign for: Do you want us to bring you one down?

Yeah, signs back Sweezus.

Lauren drags the board from the van and indicates one end to Nietzsche.

Nietzsche appears to be showing some reluctance. He points to his groin area, circumspectly.

Lauren flips the surfboard and presents him the pointy end.

He has little choice now but to take it.

They bring the board down the ramp together.

Ridiculoso! thinks Sweezus.

Here you are, Sweezie, says Lauren. Now you can go in. But maybe you shouldn't. You've just had that big burger.

Thanks, says Sweezus. Yeah, I'll wait a bit longer.

Good boy, says Lauren.

See? she says, turning to Nietzsche. HE takes my advice.

I took your advice, says Nietzsche.

Not really, says Lauren. You used the Vaseline. I recommended the aloe vera.

I didn't realise you were advising me against it, says Nietzsche.

I wasn't, says Lauren. It was your choice. What would you have used, Sweezie?

Huh? asks Sweezus, his eyes on a wave.

On a surf rash, says Lauren. Vaseline or aloe vera?

Oh yeah, aloe vera, says Sweezus. Vaseline's petroleum jelly. Bad for the eco. Bad for the sea.

I'm not going in again, says Nietzsche. And Vaseline is thicker.

Good choice then, says Sweezus, remembering his mission.

Nietzsche's moustache curves slightly upwards. This means he is smiling.

Go for it, Sweezus.

I was wondering, says Sweezus, if you'd be interested in writing a short piece for Velosophy?

What about? asks Lauren. I could write one on Reiki.

He meant me, says Nietzsche.

I could help you write it, says Lauren.

I write alone, says Nietzsche. Without any restrictions.

That's cool, says Sweezus. There's no restrictions. You can write about anything. Just so long as....

But Nietzsche is off on a roll now.

I shall write on this theme. Man is an experiment. Much error and ignorance has come forth in him.

I must say I agree with you there, says Lauren. If only they'd listen.

Sweezus can't wait any longer. The waves are increasing in size. His Big Burger is diminishing. He has sort of got an agreement from Nietzsche. The bicycle problem can wait. He gets up, grabs the second best surfboard and heads for the water.

There now, you see what I mean? says Lauren.