The Truth Ineluctable

Hey! says Sweezus. The door's open.

So we don't need the ladder, says Arthur.

Caution! says Victor. It may be a ruse.

It wasn't open when we got here, says Sweezus. 

Someone must've opened it, says Arthur. 

He goes in. No one.

He closes the door.

The Ears are dangling from the inside handle, by means of a long knotted string.

Trying to escape? asks Arthur. 

Not at all, says the larger of the Ears. We are opening the door to let you know all is well here.

Doesn't look that way, says Arthur. He opens the door.

Sweezus and Victor come in.

Arthur shuts it.

The Ears drop to the floor.

So this is them, says Sweezus. They're smaller than I imagined.

They are, says Victor. Hardly worth all this kerfuffle.

They were bigger, last time I saw them, says Arthur. 

Are you being starved? asks Victor, kneeling down to Ear level.

No, says the smaller Ear. There are French pastries, anchovies and crackers upstairs.

Let's go up, says Sweezus.

You can't just go up, says the larger Ear. You need clearance.

I have a warrant, says Victor.

They all go up the stairs.

Bonsoir, says Captain du Couedic. I see you have bypassed security.

Victor waves the warrant.

Saint Roley flies over to inspect it.

What are you doing here? asks Victor.

Visiting, says Saint Roley.

A nice coincidence, says Victor.

All right if I have a pastry? asks Sweezus.

Go ahead, says Captain du Couedic. I recommend the cannelés.

What are those chocolate ones? asks Sweezus.

Rose des sables, says Captain du Couedic.

Sweezus takes a macaron, which he had his eye on.

Arthur takes a rose des sables.

Victor continues to fulfil his duty.

Captain, I have reason to believe that the Ears are being starved, due to a witness statement that they have grown smaller.

Hélas, says Captain du Couedic. I have noted this too. It is not due to starvation, but the fact that they are fashioned from orange peel which tends to shrink and harden, ineluctably. 

The Ears look at one another in anguish.

They had believed they would live a fine life in the lighthouse with Captain du Couedic forever.