Saturday, November 21, 2020

We Need To Talk

 How could I have eaten it? asks Sweezus. It's not even here.

Saint Roley brought both Ears, explains Gaius. It appears you have eaten the smaller one.

My un! cries Baby-Glossy.

Don't worry, says Terence. It's not even them. And you've still got the other one.

Me, says the larger Ear, from half way out of the cellophane packet.

Shit-a-brick! says Sweezus. It was probably full of bacteria.

Time will tell, says Gaius. Why don't you lie down.

Yeah, says Sweezus. I am pretty knackered.

Me too, says Arthur. How's the sushi going?

Good, says Louisa. It just needs rolling up.

I'll do it, says Victor. I've been offered a taste test.

Great, says Louisa. Roll it up  like this, and then chop it into three pieces,

Doesn't anyone care that my fellow Ear has been eaten? asks the Ear which hasn't been eaten.

I do! says Baby-Glossy. It was my un. Would YOU like to be my un?

I will gladly be your un, says the Ear. Don't let them eat me.

Sweezus is about to go and lie down, but he thinks it's worth pointing out that the chocolate tapenade flavoured with the orange peel ear tasted awesome.

He tells Louisa, who looks doubtful.

Just saying, says Sweezus.

He goes into the spare bedroom, followed by Arthur.

Those guys, says Louisa. They're not the only ones that pulled an all-nighter.

Victor looks smug. He takes a bite of the hairy red sushi.

What do you think? asks Louisa.

May I have a drink of water? asks Victor.

That bad? asks Louisa. Well, stuff it. I'm going to bed too.

So am I, says Gaius. 

I'll be off, says Victor. He leaves, coughing and harrumping.

Only Terence, Baby-Glossy, the Ear and Saint Roley are left in the kitchen.

What's that? asks Saint Roley.

My brick, says Terence. I'm the owner.

You are fickle, says Saint Roley. You loved those Ears. Now you ignore them.

Now he loves the brick, says Baby-Glossy. He calls it Peut-être.

It's understandable, moans the Ear. A brick is a brick. Whereas, look at me.

Everyone looks at the Ear, including Peut-être.

We need to talk, says Peut-être.


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