Sunday, February 23, 2025

Deep Fake Or Me

They set off, on their bikes.

Gaius is pulling the pullalong, with Terence, Little Mystic and Roo-kai inside.

Surfing-with-Whales is in front.

Breakfast in Strahan? shouts Surfing-with-Whales, over his shoulder.

I've had breakfast! shouts Gaius.

I haven't! shouts Surfing-with-Whales.

Stop off then, and catch up later! shouts Gaius.

Okay! shouts Surfing-with-Whales.

And pick up some snacks! says Gaius. I'll reimburse you. 

No worries! shouts Surfing-with-Whales, pulling away.

Gaius keeps pedalling.

The pullalong seems heavy.

He slows down and stops.

What? asks Terence.

There seems to be extra weight in the pullalong, says Gaius.

No there isn't, says Terence.

The wet blanket, says Roo-kai. 

Aha! that will be it, says Gaius. I could ditch it, but that doesn't seem like a responsible action.

Try squeezing it out, says Roo-kai.

Hm, says Gaius.

He tries squeezing it out.

A few drops splash onto the road. But the wet blanket remains heavy

His phone rings.

It's Sweezus. 

Hello, Sweezus, says Gaius. You've caught me at an inopportune moment.

Just a quick one, says Sweezus. Can you send me a video of you doing something, and talking.

Whatever for? asks Gaius.

This AI thing, says Sweezus. I've got to make a deep fake of you.

But I'm coming, says Gaius. I'm on my way now, or would be but for this cursed blanket.

Yeah that's great, says Sweezus. Can you say that that again but on Facetime.

No, says Gaius. I need to squeeze out this blanket. I'll get Terence to do it.

He hands Terence his phone. 

Press Facetime, says Gaius.

Terence presses the button for Facetime.

Sweezus sees Terence's face peering at him.

Hey little buddy. What's been happening?

A baby skate died! says Terence. It was trying to escape on my skateboard and Surfing-with-Whales didn't know and he chucked it into the pullalong and it got squashed and died.

That's bad luck, says Sweezus. You guys were supposed to be, like, counting them weren't you?

We did, says Terence. We got up to twelve.

And now it's eleven, says Sweezus.

No it's still twelve, says Terence.

Okay, if you say so,  says Sweezus. But one's dead. Turn the camera on Gaius and tell him to say something.

Terence turns the camera on Gaius.

We can't count the dead one, says Gaius.

Cool, says Sweezus. Say some more stuff.

How does this AI thing work? asks Gaius.

I don't know, says Sweezus. But it's pretty amazing. 

That remains to be seen, says Gaius. Tell me, if I turn up in time, who plays the old lady, the deep fake or me?

Whichever one's better, says Sweezus.

Humph! snorts Gaius.

Only kidding, says Sweezus. Thanks Gaius! Thanks little buddy! See you guys soon.

That was lucky, says Terence. 

What was? asks Gaius.

He didn't ask what I had in my pocket, says Terence.

If Gaius was less concerned about the wet blanket, he might have suspected something at this point.


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