Perfect For One Second

It's a wooden clothes horse, in three upright sections, with hinges.

It doesn't look like I expected, says Terence.

That's because of the stuff draped all over it, says Sweezus. Let's take it off.

Terence starts to pull off the pillowcases and antimacassars.

Don't drop them, says Sweezus. Mrs Hill will have to wash them again.

With no hands, says Terence.

Yeah, says Sweezus. And no anything. I wonder how she strung up these wet socks and undies?

On her tiptoes, says Terence.

Think about that, says Sweezus.

While Terence thinks about Mrs Hill's tiptoes, Sweezus throws the pillowcases and antimacassars across the wet socks and cotton drawers overhead.

They should dry just the same.

Now the clothes horse is exposed in all its non-horseness.

It's no good, says Terence. 

Wait till I turn it on its side, says Sweezus. 

He tips it and turns it into a triangular structure.

Terence sees the possibility.

If he sat on the top bar, it would look bit horsey. 

It would be better with a head, says Terence.

Yeah it would, says Sweezus. 

He whips down a pair of cotton drawers, and hooks them over one end of the top bar.

It looks like an elephant, says Terence.

Imagine it's a horse, says Sweezus. 

With two trunks, says Terence. Okay. It needs a tail at the other end.

Easy. Sweezus pulls down a sock.

Now I get on, says Terence. Can you lift me?

Sure can, says Sweezus.

He lifts Terence onto the top bar of the horse.

For one second, it's perfect.

And then...

The elephant horse collapses.

It was bound to do that, says Sweezus. You okay?

Yes, says Terence. Can I try again?

The same thing'll happen, says Sweezus. 

Unless we stop it, says Terence.

Yep. We could jam something up against the sides, says Sweezus.

Yes! says Terence. Let's do it!

We'll take it back to our room, says Sweezus. It's cold in this laundry.

Is it? asks Terence. But we'd have to be quiet.

I'll set you up in the self catering area, says Sweezus. 

But I'd still have to be quiet, says Terence.

Tell you what, says Sweezus. You can wear my head phones and I'll find you some galloping-type music. No one'll hear it but you.

And my horse, says Terence.

Sweezus picks up the clothes horse and Terence follows him out of the laundry.

It's three am in Goolwa. 

No one sees them.

And what if they did?

It's not like they're stealing a horse

(or an elephant).