The Joke Is What?

There is nothing in the bedroom with which to prop up a mattress.

Kierkegaard decides to have a look in the laundry. He remembers observing a broom handle there.

He is passing through the kitchen on his way to the laundry when he hears Gaius enunciating loudly: DIS-TIN-GUISH-ING FEAT-URES!

And Terence saying: Yes! DINKY SQUISH FEATURES! It's nearly the SAME!

And then Kierkegaard enters the laundry, missing the rest of the conversation, which continues.

Gaius: Now what's this about pumpkins in forty five minutes?

Alexander Red-Hook: A joke.

Gaius: I enjoy a good joke. What is it?

Alexander Red-Hook: Do you know the story of Cinderella?

Gaius: No.

Terence: Me either

Alexander-Red-Hook: No wonder you didn't think my pumpkin joke was funny.

Terence: I would think it was funny if you weren't in our experiment.

Gaius: Terence is right. We can't allow you to turn into a pumpkin. But go on, continue.

Alexander-Red-Hook: Once upon a time.....

Alexander-Yellowsun: O I love this story!

Gaius: Do keep it short though. I hear Kierkegaard banging about in the laundry. Sometimes when you move one thing, everything collapses.

Kierkegaard (faintly, from the laundry): Ouch! Drat and damnation!

Alexander Red-Hook: I'll just tell the part about the pumpkin.

Terence: Yay!

Alexander-Yellowsun: It won't make sense if you don't explain why Cinderella gets into a pumpkin.

Alexander-Red-Hook: Don't worry. I will. But it isn't a pumpkin when she gets into it.

Gaius: Could you begin please?

Alexander-Red-Hook: Okay. There was once a beautiful sand crab called Cinderella who had to live with a mean crab family who made her do chores.

Terence: What are chores?

Alexander-Red-Hook:  Sweeping and dishes. And she had two ugly crab sisters who didn't have to do any chores, but went to crab-dancing classes.

Terence: In a pumpkin?

Alexander Yellowsun: No. Wait and see.

Alexander Red Hook: Well, no. She was crying at home because she couldn't go to the crab-dancing classes and a Sweet-Crab-Mother appeared with a pumpkin. and said would you like me to turn it into a speedboat, you can go to crab-dancing classes in it, because I can do that. Yes please said Cinderella, so she did and she went to the crab-dancing classes and forgot that if she didn't get home in forty five minutes the speed boat would turn back into a pumpkin.

Gaius: I see. And the joke is what exactly?

Alexander-Red-Hook: In a similar situation, one can say one must get home before one turns into a pumpkin.

Gaius: But she didn't know it would happen.

Alexander-Red-Hook: She did, but she forgot. I left out that part.

Alexander-Yellowsun: You could easily guess it.

Gaius: You had no such constraints put on you. Unless....is it something to do with the forty five minutes?

Thus Gaius edges closer to discovering the truth of the matter.