Tuesday, March 4, 2025

The German Colonel In The Arbour

Back in Adelaide, Vello holds a rehearsal.

Listen up, everyone, says Vello, I've been talking to Gaius.

Is he coming? asks Belle.

He's crossing Bass Strait as we speak, says Vello. And he gave me some valuable feedback regarding the cushion.

His buttock cushion? says Belle. 

That's the one, says Vello. It seems at least one person thought it was funny.

It was funny, says Belle. Is he bringing it with him?

I doubt he travelled all the way to Tasmania with it, says Vello. It'll be in the costume box.

Belle starts looking.

Sweezus and Arthur arrive for the rehearsal.

You're late, says Vello. How's the AI thing going?

Good, says Sweezus. I've perfected the horse and I've streamlined the old lady.

Better unstreamline her, says Belle. She's funnier with the cushion.

No worries, says Sweezus. Is that the cushion?

Belle has found it, and is holding it up.

Sweezus takes his phone out.

Want me to put the old lady's skirt on? asks Belle. With the cushion?

Yeah, that would help, says Sweezus.

She ties the cushion to one side of her bottom, with strings that remain from last year. Then she puts the skirt on.

Sweezus makes a video of her from all angles.

I thought Gaius was coming, says Arthur.

He is, says Vello, but we need the AI effects. The audience will expect it.

Only because you advertised it in your flyer, says Belle.

I know, says Vello. I hope I won't regret it.

You won't, says Sweezus. I've got the hang of it now.

Right, says Vello. Tonight were rehearsing Scene Three, the German Colonel in the Arbour.

That's me, says Arthur.

Watch this, says Sweezus.

He calls up the special AI effects of an Arbour.

A pretty colonnade of green and gold marble with lattice work cages filled with hummingbirds, birds of paradise, parakeets and guinea fowl. And a table containing gold plates and a luxurious dinner.

O well done, says Vello. Cue, Arthur!

Arthur steps forward. His face changes. He now has red tips to his ears, and arched eyebrows.

He looks like a German Colonel.

What part of Germany do you come from? asks the German Colonel.

Westphalia, says Sweezus, I was born at Castle Thunder-ten-tronckh.

You don't say? says the German Colonel. So was I!

How extraordinary! says Sweezus.

Can this really be you? exclaims the German Colonel.

They fall back in amazement, embrace each other, and burst into tears.

Arthur likes this part, and the next part is even better........


No comments: