Kant On Wheels

The bus to Victor Harbor starts moving.

Arthur sits near the back.

Gaius and Terence sit on the dark side, close to the middle.

Why did we need a thermometer? asks Terence.

To take the temperature of the sea, says Gaius.

Can I do it? asks Terence.

That would be good in one way and bad in another, says Gaius.

Why? asks Terence.

Good because you wouldn't get a rash or a cough from the algae, says Gaius.

Has the algae gone? asks Terence.

No, but you are generally impervious, says Gaius.

So can I do it? asks Terence.

You know what happens when you venture too far into the sea, says Gaius.

Yes, says Terence. I sink.

You sink, says Gaius.

So I could take the temperature of the sea at the bottom, says Terence.

That's a good point, says Gaius. It might be worth doing.

Yay, thinks Terence. 

At the back of the bus, Arthur is making a phone call to Sweezus.

Ring ring! Sweezus answers.

Hey bro!  Where are you?

On the bus to Victor Harbor, says Arthur.

Thought you were going to Waitpinga, says Sweezus.

We are, says Arthur. We're hiring bikes in Victor.

Cool, says Sweezus. We're heading straight to Waitpinga.

We? says Arthur.

This old dude's coming with me, says Sweezus. 

How come? asks Arthur.

The boss insisted. says Sweezus. He wants me to interview this guy for Velosophy, so I had this brainwave.

To bring him with you, says Arthur. Does he know about the poisonous froth?

The old dude? says Sweezus. No I just told him it's scenic. 

Right, says Arthur. What's his name?

Kant, says Sweezus. Immanuel. 

Rings a bell, says Arthur.

It should, says Sweezus. He's famous. But heaps weird as well. He goes for a walk every afternoon at three thirty.

No matter what? says Arthur.

So he claims, says Sweezus. And he keeps his socks up in this weird way as well.

Does he ride a bike? asks Arthur.

Dunno, says Sweezus. Guess I should ask him.

I thought that was one of the requirements, says Arthur. 

Yeah, says Sweezus. The boss wouldn't have set it up otherwise. 

Kant on Wheels, says Arthur.

I might borrow that title, says Sweezus.

How does he keep his socks up? asks Arthur.

With tapes up his legs and into his pockets, says Sweezus.

So he doesn't wear shorts, says Arthur.

Shit no, says Sweezus,