That Tricky Pierre

Alas! said Pliny the Elder. Kobo is dead! She was my favorite. Why did you kill her off?

What makes you think she's dead? I asked.

It is here in black and white, said Pliny. Defunct. And she hadn't even finished Humboldt's Gift, he added.

It wasn't me who said she was dead, I replied. It was that tricky Pierre.

Oh, said Pliny. You mean...?

Think about it, Pliny. Kobo is a fossilised clam. How could she die? And you should know the dimensions of the Horrid Hole in our kitchen sink. Would Kobo fit down it? I think not.

Aha, said Pliny. Pierre was lying. Will Ageless find out?

You'll have to wait and see, I said. But I thought it was time for a break.

What about Humboldt's Gift? said Pliny. By the time we come back to these characters Kobo will be reading something else!

Are you interested? I asked. Then you're in luck because I've been reading it too.

I know that, said Pliny. But I'm sure you won't mind me saying that Kobo's opinion of the novels she reads is always far more interesting than yours.

But Kobo didn't understand it, I said. It wasn't just about the Gift. Or rather it was but the gift was more than just the film script. The gift was a lesson in what is important in life besides money. And Humboldt didn't even know he was giving that gift. That's why the book won the Pulitzer Prize. Americans are suckers for that sort of thing. Especially if it's funny at the same time.

It was funny? said Pliny. Kobo never said it was funny.

Well, there you are, I said. She can be quite thick.