Courage Fortitude Integrity And Pineapple

Admiral de Guichen examines the leg for signs of familiarity.

Gaius has been mulling something over.

I believe you are a fraud, says Gaius, to Admiral de Guichen.

A fraud? says Admiral de Guichen. How dare you!

Masquerading as an Admiral, says Gaius. Is that your leg?

It is, says Admiral de Guichen.

Then, says Gaius, I put it to you that your story is a false one. For two reasons.

Arthur, having  finished off the sangria, is examining the bottom of the jug, and listening.

Go on, says Admiral de Guichen.

One, says Gaius, you told Schopenhauer it was an old sea injury.

I didn't say how old, says Admiral de Guichen

Two, says Gaius, you didn't know what a following wind was.

A temporary aberration, prompted by the loss of my pereipod, says Admiral de Guichen.

Your pereipod! says Gaius. A learned term. Perhaps I have misjudged you.

Forgiven, says Admiral de Guichen. We lobsters are not ones to bear a grudge. I wonder, is there any chance I might get in that jug now?

There are chunks of pineapple in the bottom, says Arthur. Just let me get them out.

He feels in his pocket. Takes out the sewing kit with the tiny scissors. Stabs at the chunks of sangria-soaked pineapple. Draws them out and eats them with his fingers.

No water? says Admiral de Guichen. The jug's no use to me without water in it.

Gaius taps on the window of the cabin.

Ray looks out.

What does he want? asks Schopenhauer.

Gaius makes water-pouring motions.

A drink, says Ray. That's rich. They had that jug of sangria, and what did we have?

Nothing, says Schopenhauer. Don't worry Ray, I'm not stopping till we get to Lorne.

They speed through Apollo Bay, scattering holiday makers.

I admire your integrity, says Ray.

I admire your fortitude, says Schopenhauer. That foot looks gangrenous.

Looks like we're not stopping, says Gaius, in the back. Courage, Admiral, it can't be far to Lorne.

Lorne, says Admiral de Guichen. I have a friend there. Captain Louttit.

I don't question it, says Gaius.

Do you want this leg? says Arthur, picking it up idly.

Not now you've got pineapple all over it, says Admiral de Guichen.