The Good Buddhist On The Shore

An hour later Arthur still hasn't turned up.

Fortunately it is pleasant in the Caledonian Beer Garden. Gaius, Ray and Schopenhauer order a third round of Coopers Pale.

Schopenhauer keeps his eye on the three surfers surfing in the bay.

They look as though they might be coming in.

Mind if I take a little stroll down to the shore? says Schopenhauer.

Go ahead, says Ray. We're not going anywhere till Arthur gets here.

The shore? says Gaius. I'll come with you. Ever on the lookout for interesting specimens. All right Ray?

Sure, says Ray, just leave me here all by myself why don't you.

Someone has to stay, says Gaius. In case....

I know, says Ray. It should be you though.

Oh all right, says Gaius crossly. You go. But keep an eye out for fossils and washed up dead creatures. And if you find anything of interest bring it back to me.

Schopenhauer and Ray make their way down to the beach, just as the three surfers are emerging from the water. Sure enough, one of them is Arthur.

Good lunch? says Arthur.

Where were you? says Schopenhauer.

Where's my car? says Ray.

Who are these dudes? says Matzo. Your dad and grand-dad?

No, says Arthur. Fellow travelers.

My name is Arthur Schopenhauer, says Schopenhauer. You may have heard of me.

Yeah? says Matzo. Wicked! Yeah we have. You're that pessimistic guy. The Buddhist.

Yeah, the Buddhist, says Fling. You thought it was the finest of religions.

(Matzo and Fling did philosophy at uni).

Ray is surprised. Schopenhauer has not struck him as a Buddhist.

But Schopenhauer looks pleased.

This surfing, says Schopenhauer. Is it difficult?

Yes and no, says Fling. That's the only truthful answer.

I like that answer, says Schopenhauer. I believe I would be good at it however. May I have a go?

Now? says Matzo. How about tomorrow?

Now, says Schopenhauer firmly.

The famous Will, grins Matzo. Okay then. Take off your jacket and roll those dorky German pants up.

And take your shoes off, says Arthur.

Jumping Jesus! says Ray. What a waste of time. And Gaius is waiting up there in the Beach Cafe for you, Arthur. Go up and tell him we're stuck down here for another couple of hours. And where's my car? I bet you've lost the car keys.

No I haven't, says Arthur.

This is true. He hasn't. He has left them in the car.

Arthur goes up to the Beach Cafe to look for Gaius.

Matzo and Fling tow Schopenhauer out to sea.

Ray wanders along the shore disconsolately, looking for fossils and washed up dead creatures.

What's that over there, half buried in seaweed? Is it moving? Or does it only seem to be moving?

Whatever.

Don't step on it, Ray!