Irene knocks on the door of Gaius's cabin.
Hello, says Irene. Everyone get back okay last night?
Yes, thank you, says Gaius. But some of our team have left their bicycles back at Stokes Bay. It's bit of a problem.
No problem, says Irene. I'm getting a lift with Mayor Clements to Emu Bay to bring back my car. They can come with us. But they have to be ready to leave in ten minutes.
Very kind, says Gaius. Arthur! Sweezus!
Sweezus rolls out of his bean bag.
Arthur rolls off the couch. Thump. Squelch.
Hey! says Terence. Watch out for Saint Joseph!
What? Where? says Arthur.
My grasshopper, says Terence. He didn't have a name, so I called him Saint Joseph.
You hated Saint Joseph, says Sweezus, reaching for the kettle.
But he could levitate, says Terence.
Sweezus doesn't like to discourage Saint Joseph-Grasshopper by saying that he couldn't.
.......
Soon Arthur, Sweezus and Irene are in the Ford Escape heading for Stokes Bay with Mayor Clements.
Sweezus is telling Irene and Mayor Clements the story of Saint Joseph-Grasshopper.
Ha ha, laughs Irene. That Terence is a character. He told me Karl Marx is his grandpa.
Not Jacques Cousteau? says Mayor Clements.
No, says Irene. But he told me some other things about Jacques Cousteau that the whole K I community would very much like to know.
Shit! says Sweezus.
What? says Arthur.
I might as well reveal myself, says Irene.
Now is as good a time as any, says Mayor Clements.
It is, says Irene. I'm a reporter from The Islander. I've been investigating your Jacques Cousteau, and your David Suzuki, and I know they are not who they say they are.
So, no speeches? says Sweezus. Good, that let's me off. We can go surfing this arvo.
Nice one, says Arthur.
No, no, says Mayor Clements. We must go ahead with the speeches.
Come ON! says Sweezus. What's the point now?
We were hoping, says Mayor Clements, that Jacques Cousteau and David Suzuki might endorse our new golf course.
No way! says Sweezus. It's ecologically irresponsible.
But they might, says Arthur, nudging Sweezus.
Oh ...yeah... I guess they might, agrees Sweezus.
.........
Gaius, Vello and Shu are having lunch in the Queenscliff Hotel, which boasts good pub grub.
Terence has finished his chips and sauce, and gone looking for string.
Saint Joseph-Grasshopper is perched on the table.
A plain sort of grasshopper, says Vello.
Unassuming, says Shu.
Inconspicuous, says Gaius.
Terence comes back with some string.
What's the string for? asks Vello. Buuurrrrp! Excuse me. There was something wrong with my gummy shark....Waitress!
It's for Saint Joseph, says Terence.
Where on earth did you get it? asks Gaius. Pubs don't usually have string.
I had some, says the waitress. Ooh! a grasshopper! Whack!
Stop! cries Terence. That's what the string's for!
No grasshoppers on the table, says the waitress.
That's what will happen, says Terence.
It appears Terence is thinking of tying the string to Saint Joseph-Grasshopper and lowering him down from the table.
Saint Joseph-Grasshopper, once he has twigged this, leaps off.
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