Saturday, July 5, 2014

Stage One: Leeds to Harrogate: Causal Connections

Sweezus, Arthur and Unni are riding together in the main peloton. It's their first real chance to catch up.

So how was Tassie? asks Sweezus.

Good, says Arthur. We might go back there. We missed out on Dismal Swamp.

Yeah, says Unni. It would've been awesome. But it was closed for the winter. And we had to come back for the Tour.

She turns to look at the summer-green Yorkshire Dales with their yellow painted sheep, dry stone walls and crowds of cheering flag-waving people.

She wobbles.

Focus, says Sweezus.

Arthur looks mildly surprised.

Sorry, says Sweezus. It's the activist in me.

Yes, says Arthur. Why are we dressed up like cuttlefish?

Unni gives him a menacing look. Shut up Arthur.

Too late, Tejay Van Garderen and André Greipel have heard him.

Tejay and André speed past, laughing. Cuttlefish! Yes! How amusing.

Yeah, says Sweezus. I was going to tell you.......oh shit! Tell you later.....

He speeds up, without explaining his tactic.

Schopenhauer rides by, in a devilish hurry.

Perhaps there's a causal connection......

.......

The sun is shining, it is almost as warm as Tasmania.

The hours have flown by. The riders are nearly in Harrogate.

The crowds are cheering.

Ageless, who formed a one-lobster breakaway earlier, is now falling back.

Louttit is steady.

Louis-Claude de Freycinet, riding beside him, is doing well for a new-comer.

Like most lobsters, he is a natural. They pass a tree.

Someone is lurking behind it.

Here comes Mark Cavendish, trying to pass Simon Gerrans, with Marcel Kittel close behind them.

Mark Cavendish is distracted, he turns his head. What's that on his nose? Is it paint?

He crashes into Simon Gerrans. Disaster!

Louis-Claude and Louttit coast on down the road.

There they go, you can see the back of their team outfits clearly.

Team Crustacean, and in yellow, across their bottoms, Popup Paintball.

What can this mean?

Marcel Kittel has no time to wonder.

He sees his way clear to a Stage One victory and powers through.


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