Stay Purple

Sweezus, Arthur and Louisa have cycled half way to Stokes Bay when Sweezus's phone rings.

Gaius! says Sweezus. What's up?

It's me, Terence, says Terence. Gaius is letting me use his phone.

So what's up? asks Sweezus. Are you and Gaius bird spotting?

Bird squashing, says Terence.

What's that? asks Sweezus. 

I'll tell you after the good news, says Terence.

What's the good news? asks Sweezus. 

I had a MOOD! says Terence. It was purple.

Purple, says Sweezus. What's that, happy?

Sad, says Terence.

I don't reckon it is, says Sweezus. I'll ask Arthur. 

He asks Arthur, who is right alongside him.

Purple means very happy, says Arthur.

Hear that? says Sweezus.

I'm not very happy, says Terence.

Why not, little buddy? asks Sweezus.

I squashed Baby-Glossy, says Terence.

As in ... now he's cactus? asks Sweezus.

Wah! says Terence. It was my fault even though Gaius says it wasn't.

You should believe Gaius, says Sweezus. 

What do you know? asks Terence. I jumped onto him from a bench he was under.

Was he just coming out? asks Sweezus. Sounds like an accident.

It was an accident, says Terence. But I made the accident. 

Good you're telling me, says Sweezus. Now put it behind you.

I'm doing a poem, says Terence.

That's awesome, says Sweezus. 

Gaius has already done one, says Terence.

Gaius? says Sweezus. What's his?

Baby-Glossy knew French and died under a bench, says Terence, summarising freely.

You can do better than that, says Sweezus.

I can't, says Terence. That's why I'm calling.

You want me to help you? says Sweezus. Okay. What's the first thing you think of when you remember Baby-Glossy?

Titty-laritty-tonton, says Terence.

Cool, says Sweezus. That was that sailor song he liked singing. Start off with that. 

Yay! says Terence. I've got my first line!

Yep! See how you go now. Stay purple, says Sweezus.

Terence wonders which purple, but it's too late to ask, because Sweezus has ended the call.

Death Of A Parrot

Sorry! Sorry! cries Terence.

But too late. He has crushed Baby-Glossy.

He looks at Gaius.

Gaius picks up crushed Baby-Glossy.

I blame myself, says Gaius.

Why? asks Terence. 

I agreed to him hiding under the bench, says Gaius. 

It was my idea, says Terence.

But I should have made sure he was not directly under your feet, says Gaius. 

Me too, says Terence. Now I've killed my parrot.

Nothing to be done, says Gaius. I'll bury him. You go inside and bring me my notebook.

Are we going to write him a poem? asks Terence.

No... well yes, why not? says Gaius. It's the least we can do for Baby-Glossy. Although I admit, I'm not good at poems.

I am, says Terence. Let's both do one.

Wonderful, says Gaius.

Terence goes inside, to look for the notebook.

Gaius starts digging with a trowel that Louisa has left nearby, next to a pot.

Terence finds the notebook. He even finds a pencil.

He sees his mood stone on the table. Will he try it? He must surely have feelings right now.

He picks up the mood stone which turns purple. 

Yippee!

(This may seem remarkable, but we must not forget Terence has been out in the sunshine).

He goes back outside, with the notebook, the pencil and the mood stone.

Look ! says Terence.

Gaius looks up from burying Baby-Glossy.

It's purple!

So it is, says Gaius. That must mean you're sad.

(Fortunately he does not know that purple indicates very happy).

Have you thought of a poem? asks Terence.

Working on it, says Gaius. How's this:

Here lies Baby-Glossy, who fell out of a sheoak

Raised by humans, and taught to speak English

And one word of French.

 Much loved was Baby-Glossy, whose life was cut short

When Terence crushed him

Jumping down from a bench.

That's good, says Terence. Except you left out I didn't do it on purpose, and it was really your fault.

I'll leave that to you, says Gaius.

Birds Love Me

Ten minutes, says Gaius. And not a single bird has appeared in the garden.

What about me? asks Baby-Glossy.

And me, says Saint Roley.

Perhaps you two are the problem, says Gaius. 

Perhaps we are, says Saint Roley. The other birds, having spotted us from a distance, are keeping away.

Get under the seat, says Terence. Birds love me.

That is debatable, says Gaius. But let's try it. That is, if Saint Roley and Baby-Glossy are willing.

I am not willing, says Saint Roley. I would find it demeaning. I shall fly back to Stokes Bay, and see how the sushi-tasting is going.

Fair enough, says Gaius. What about you, Baby-Glossy?

Are you coming with me? asks Saint Roley.

What is the meaning of demeaning? asks Baby-Glossy.

Ha ha! laughs Terence. The meaning of de meaning. That's a good one.

Am I un good un? says Baby-Glossy. 

A good one, says Gaius. 

Baby-Glossy decides he will stay, if Gaius and Terence think he's a good un.

 He hops down from the stone bench and tucks himself under it, looking out between Gaius's legs and Terence's toes.

Saint Roley flies off, glad to be solo.

Four purple crowned lorikeets fly past him in the opposite direction.

Saint Roley ignores them.

Let them go where they like.

The four purple crowned lorikeets are looking for apricots.

There are none in Louisa's back garden.

The lorikeets fly over the garden.

Look! says Gaius. Four purple crowned lorikeets, flying over!

Where? asks Terence.

Up there! says Gaius. Drat. I should have brought my notebook. I left it inside.

I'll get it, says Terence. I want to get my mood stone.

He drops down from the stone bench, rather heavily.

Crunch! He lands on Baby-Glossy.

Thermometer Mystery

The kitchen smells of orange and chocolate, with undertones of seaweed.

There is a plate of hairy red sushi, on the table.

Everyone looks at Terence.

Don't worry, I KNOW! says Terence. 

You are a bad un, says Baby Glossy. You have no feelings. Ear is no more.

I do have feelings, says Terence. Brown feelings.

Aw, says Louisa. 

Woa, little buddy, says Sweezus.

Brown means nothing, says Arthur. Not even normal.

What're you talking about? asks Sweezus.

He's got a mood stone, says Arthur. 

Hold out your hand, says Terence.

Sweezus holds out his hand.

Terence places the mood stone on his palm.

It turns pink.

Pink, says Arthur. 

What's pink? asks Terence.

Cool, says Arthur. 

Are you making that up? asks Sweezus. 

No, says Arthur. It's official.

Give it to me! cries Terence.

Sweezus gives Terence the mood stone, which turns brown immediately.

Too slow, says Terence.

Where'd you get that? asks Sweezus.

The chemist, says Arthur. And here's the thermometer.

Yeah, thanks, says Sweezus. We need to talk about that.

I didn't steal it. says Arthur. I said I'd pay for it later, but it turned out I was talking to the cleaner.

Am I to understand you didn't pay? asks Gaius. No wonder Victor has been asking questions.

Yeah, says Sweezus. He knows I told Captain du Couedic I'd replace his thermometer. So he thought it was me.

What was you? asks Arthur.

The burglar, says Sweezus. Whoever it was cleaned out the chemist's entire stock of thermometers.

Lucky I got these before that happened, says Arthur.

These? says Sweezus. I thought you only got ONE.

Two, says Arthur. I'd already got one when the cleaner gave me another one. 

That's clear as mud, says Louisa. Why don't we three go back to Stokes Bay with the sushi, and leave one thermometer here. Gaius can give it to Victor when he comes by.

How am I to explain it? asks Gaius.

Arthur's already explained it, says Louisa. 

Arthur, Sweezus and Louisa are through the door in seconds, with the sushi wrapped in cling wrap, heading for Stokes Bay.

Gaius is left with Terence, Baby Glossy, Saint Roley, in Louisa's kitchen.

This is a time waster, says Gaius. I had hoped to get out and spot birds.

Then let's sit in the garden, says Saint Roley.

Excellent idea, says Gaius.

They go outside and sit on a stone bench under a peppermint gum.

The mood stone and the thermometer remain inside, on the kitchen table.

They soon find they have much in common.

Orange Means Lovable

Arthur and Terence arrive at Louisa's.

Saint Roley is waiting, outside the front door.

Guess what I got? says Terence.

Not a compass? asks Saint Roley.

Correct, says Terence. Not a compass, but I got a mood stone and I'm going to test it on Sweezus to see if he's cool.

Or stressed, says Arthur. Or fearful or nervous or normal or relaxed or calm or lovable or passionate or happy.

I imagine he's somewhere in the top three, says Saint Roley.

Why, what's happened? asks Arthur.

That's why I'm here, says Saint Roley. To warn you.

Go ahead, warn us, says Arthur.

Well, says Saint Roley, looking at Terence. Remember the Ear?

Course I do, says Terence. And guess what? Arthur found out that orange means lovable.

Focus, says Saint Roley. Remember that Louisa was going to do something with the grater?

No, says Terence. 

Yes, says Arthur. Let me guess. She grated the Ear.

Only gradually, says Saint Roley. 

My Ear? says Terence. I was going to tell him that orange means lovable because he was orange.

He was, says Saint Roley. Now he's more of a flavour.

In the sushi? asks Arthur. 

Yes, in the sushi, says Saint Roley. 

What about Sweezus? asks Arthur.

Victor wants him to answer some questions, says Saint Roley. He's waiting for you.

Questions about what? asks Arthur.

Some items have gone missing from the chemist, says Saint Roley. 

Woo! says Terence. We were just there. It's where I got this.

He shows Saint Roley the mood stone.

Saint Roley brushes it with a wing tip.

It turns orange.

One I Could Be

That was good, says Arthur.

He and Terence are walking back to Louisa's.

No it wasn't, says Terence. I didn't get a compass.

But you got a mood stone, says Arthur.

It doesn't work, says Terence.

He shows Arthur his mood stone.

It's still brown.

Give it here, says Arthur.

The mood stone turns purple.

Look, says Arthur. It's changed colour. Now you try.

He returns the mood stone to Terence.

It turns brown.

What's a mood? asks Terence.

Sullen, says Arthur. 

Is that what you are? asks Terence.

Not these days, says Arthur. I used to be sometimes at school.

What's another one? asks Terence. One I could be.

You said you wanted to be cool, says Arthur.

But how do you BE cool? asks Terence.

You just are, says Arthur. Sweezus is cool.

Well I'm going to test him, says Terence.

Good idea, says Arthur. 

Is it? says Terence.

Yes, says Arthur. Does that make you feel happy?

YES! says Terence.  

He looks at his mood stone.

Brown.

No, says Terence. I'm not happy.

Give it to me again, says Arthur. I'll make myself run through a mix of emotions.

Arthur can do that, being a poet.

Into the furious lashings of the tides I danced on the eternal rollers of victims...says Arthur.

What? asks Terence.

Pretending to be a boat, says Arthur.

Let's see if it worked, says Terence. 

They look at the stone.

Green!

It works, says Arthur. But I wonder what green means.

He realises he could find out by googling mood stones.

Blue For Cool

Terence has not found a compass.

You could buy one online, says the chemist.

Wah! says Terence. I couldn't.

Not you, a grown up, says the chemist. Ask your dad over there.

Ha ha! laughs Terence. That's not my dad. That's Arthur.

Ask him, says the chemist. Meanwhile, how would you like me to find you a mood stone?

What is it? asks Terence.

It changes colour as your mood changes, says the chemist. Blue for cool, red for angry.

The chemist has no idea really.

Yes, says Terence. Give me a moon stone.

MOOD stone, says the chemist. There should be a few in this basket.

The chemist lets Terence choose his own mood stone.

It's easy because they're all brown.

That's because nobody owns them, says the chemist. But yours will soon get to know you.

Good, says Terence. Then I'll know if I'm COOL.

Arthur stands up. How much do I owe you?

Fifteen dollars, says the chemist. And I'll throw in a digital thermometer. There's not much call for them nowadays.

Thanks, says Arthur. Can I drop by and pay later?

Sure. Pay the chemist, says the chemist.

Funny. Why would the chemist say pay the chemist?

He'll be here soon, says the chemist who may not be a chemist.

Gotta finish the cleaning before he gets here, adds the definitely-not-chemist.

Sure, says Arthur. I thought you were the chemist.

No, I'm the....err....cleaner, says the cleaner.

Arthur and Terence leave with the bandage, the pawpaw ointment, two digital thermometers and a mood stone.

The cleaner leaves shortly after, through a back door.