A Parrot Not The Solar System

Help yourselves to carrots and chicken, says Gaius. 

Interesting carrots, says Pierre-Louis. 

An old Roman recipe, says Gaius. 

Very distinctive, says Vello. What have you added?

Mint, cumin and vinegar, says Gaius. And black pepper. Also salt and olive oil, and a little water.

Vello prongs a carrot with his fork.

It drips on the tablecloth, on the way to his mouth.

Careless of me, says Vello.

Not at all, says Gaius. Any stains will come out in the wash.

This is a very bad table cloth, says Terence.

Why do you say that? asks David. Oh, I know. The holes.

I don't see any holes, says Pierre-Louis.

Look under Leo the Chicken, says Terence.

But Pierre Louis has better manners than to look under Leo the Chicken.

So, says Gaius, Pierre-Louis, I hear you are a man of letters.

I have written a few things, says Pierre-Louis. 

He made an expedition to Lapland, says Davis. He still has the hat.

I have, says Pierre-Louis. But of course it's too hot to wear it in your Adelaide summer.

You don't like the heat? asks Gaius.

Pierre-Louis senses a trap. 

I have become used to it, says Pierre-Louis.

You had better be used to it, says Vello.

Fear not, says Pierre-Louis.

What's this about? asks Gaius.

The Tour Down Under, says Vello. Pierre-Louis's trying out for our team.

Been in many competitions? asks Gaius.

I'm quite new to it, says Pierre-Louis. 

You're too modest, says Vello. Tell Gaius about your scientific technique.

It is based on my principle of least action, says Pierre-Louis.

Ha ha! laughs Gaius.

It's not funny, says Vello. Pierre-Louis has invented an integral equation that determines the path followed by a physical system.

Take these carrot circles, says Pierre-Louis. Let us say they represent the solar system.

Too late, says Terence. They're supposed to be Chicken McChicken. 

You did say they'd change fast, says David.

Yes, says Terence, moving one or two circles. Now they're Leo the Parrot.

You have revealed a hole, says Gaius. 

Oops! says Terence. He moves another circle from Chicken McChicken to the hole in the middle of Leo the Parrot.

More wine anyone? asks Gaius.

Why not? says Vello. It must improve with aging.

Ha ha! laughs Pierre-Louis. Like all of us.

Gaius pours more wine, giving Pierre-Louis an especially large one.