Before the race:
David: I ate too much at yesterday's picnic.
Vello: I saw.
Gaius: You'll work it off today, David.
Humboldt: Five big climbs. What is our race plan?
Vello: You won't need a race plan. I guarantee the other teams will be in disarray.
David: You surely don't think your dropping of dark hints yesterday will make any difference?
Vello: Froggy went straight back to blab to his team.
Gaius: About you know what? None of us knew what that was. So he couldn't.
Vello: Trust me. I know how these things work.
Sure enough, some of the teams are discussing what happened at Team Philosophe's picnic.
Team Sky for example.
Geraint Thomas: And the little guy Terence, came back asking for chicken. And turns out he wanted to feed it to the swans. But he thought they were ducks. And there wasn't any chicken.
Chris Froome: No chicken?
Geraint Thomas: Ha ha, no, it was pigeon.
Wout Poels: Ducks don't eat chicken.
Geraint Thomas: It wasn't chicken. And they weren't ducks. But the funny thing was....
Froome: Guys, come on. What's our race plan?
Geraint Thomas: Stay at the front, control the pace and and make sure the day's disappointing.
So we see that as far as Team Sky is concerned, Vello's plan has been undermined by Terence.
What about Team AG2R-La Mondiale?
Froggy is their spy.
Here they are, talking.
Not before the race, but during.
Romain Bardet: Does anyone get why the kid thought a duck was a parrot?
Tony Gallopin: No, he thought pigeons were parrots.
Romain Bardet: But they're nothing like them.
Oliver Naesen: Irrelevant. The only real birds in the story were swans. The pigeon was part of the picnic.
Romain Bardet: Invited?
Tony Gallopin: No, on the menu.
Vello will have to do better.
And Froggy is an incompetent spy.
But what is happening, race-wise?
Team Sky are succeeding in making the day disappointing. By preventing attacks and by Froomey not crashing.
Julian Alaphilippe of Team Quick-Step Floors has gone solo up the col de la Columbiere, and never looked back, increasing his lead on the final descent.
No doubt thinking of swans.
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