Wednesday, December 29, 2021

Rhymes With Farts

Sweezus and Gaius are trying to sleep in the back of the camper.

Terence is making clanging noises.

Shush! says Gaius. 

I keep falling over, says Terence. 

Go outside, says Gaius. But don't go too far from the camper.

Yay! says Terence.

Take Roo-kai with you, says Gaius.

Thanks, says Roo-kai. 

Terence climbs down from the camper, clutching his crystal.

Roo-kai follows.

Over there, says Roo-kai. 

He points to a tree and a lamp post.

The leaves cast moving shadows. 

Try now, says Roo-kai.

Terence stands on one leg, and wobbles.

Hold the crystal up to the light, says Roo-kai.

Terence holds it up to the light.

It's got a FACE! says Terence, before falling over.

Let me see, says Roo-kai. Yes, it looks angry. 

That's why it's not working, says Terence.

Put it down, says Roo-kai.

Terence puts it down on a tree root.

Ask it, says Roo-kai.

What's your problem? asks Terence.

Not like that, says Roo-kai.

Okay, says Terence, I'll explain everything to it. Then ask it.

He lies on his front, face to face with the crystal.

I'll explain everything to YOU! says the crystal.

Woo! says Terence. Go on.

What is your name? asks the crystal.

Terence, says Terence.

And are you a fine specimen? asks the crystal.

No, you are, says Terence.

But is it not a generalisation? asks the crystal.

You've lost him, says Roo-kai. He thinks you're a spaceman.

My point exactly, says the crystal. He has strayed from the particular to the general, and then insulted me with a mispronunciation.

I agree, says Roo-kai. Terence, your crystal feels insulted.

Sorry, says Terence.

There, says Roo-kai. Terence is sorry. What would you like him to call you?

Quarz, says the crystal.

As in quartz? asks Roo-kai. That's not very particular.

It's German, says Quarz. For quartz. That's why I like it. It's subtle.

 It's a good name, say Terence. It rhymes with farts. So I won't forget it. 

Try and balance now, says Roo-kai.

Terence stands up and transfers his weight to one leg.

It will be interesting to find out what happens.



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