Nothing An Apple

Gaius opens his mouth.

Captain de Kermadec looks into it, before inserting his dominant claw.

Uth-uth! says Gaius, protesting.

Sorry, says Captain de Kermadec. Nearly finished. Raise your hand if you feel any discomfort.

Gaius raises his hand.

He's doing it! says Terence.

Yes he is, says Katherine. Do take your claw out.

Captain de Kermadec pulls his claw out.

Have a spit, Gaius, says Katherine.

Water! says Gaius.

Captain Bruni opens a bottle of mineral water.

Normal water please, says Gaius. I'm not spitting out mineral water.

Good for you, says Katherine.

Captain Bruni goes to the tap above the tiny sink, and turns it on.

Water streams out. It looks normal.

Spitting done, Gaius awaits Captain de Kermadec's opinion.

Your toot is cracked, says the Captain.

Tooth, says Gaius. What are my options?

Five options, says Captain de Kermadec.

One: bonding; Two: a crown; Three: root canal; Four: extraction; Five: no treatment.

Thank you, says Gaius. But I might first try the erigeron method.

Erigeron method? says Captindn de Kermadec. I don't know that one.

An ancient Roman cure for toothache, says Gaius. A bit of a fiddle, but sometimes it works.

What is it? asks the Captain.

You draw a line around the erigeron with an iron tool, says Gaius, then, you dig it up and touch the sore tooth with it three times, spitting after each touch. Then you replant the erigeron in its original spot, to keep it alive. The tooth should never ache again.

I should be very surprised if that worked, says Captain de Kermadec.

So should I, says Katherine.

Cheap though, says Captain Bruni.

If you can find it, says Arthur.

Very common, says Gaius, Seaside daisy. There are bound to be some growing on Bruny Island. Thank you for your inspection, Captain de Kermadec.

Not at all, says Captain de Kermadec. Would you like a free clean? I saw a bit of plaque there.

Nothing an apple can't deal with, says Gaius.